Clemens Beyond the Point of No Return

It’s been so long since Roger Clemens testified in front of Congress that I forgot about half the shenanigans that went down (except the now infamous “misremembers part”). Initially Clemens showed his feelings on the matter, saying he wouldn’t call PED users “cheaters.” In a pathetic effort to save himself, Clemens dragged his wife’s name through the mud and said Andy Pettitte had things mistaken.

Now Clemens doesn’t have much of a defense. Public opinion and Congressional opinion is now speaking and Clemens will have to face trial on charges of perjury obstruction of justice. Even though we all well know and believe that he was juicing since his Toronto days, he’s still maintaining steadfastly that he is innocent. Clemens is taking his lies so far that he is willing to go to jail for them. Here’s what he tweeted late Thursday:

I never took HGH or Steroids. And I did not lie to Congress. I look forward to challenging the Governments accusations, and hope people will keep an open mind until trial. I appreciate all the support I have been getting. I am happy to finally have my day in court.

Happy to have my day in court? Damn Roger, they will eat you alive and make you misremember even more. I can’t believe he’s so willing to enter the torture chamber. George Costanza wouldn’t even go this far.

Roger Clemens on Twitter

Derek Lee Could Be Headed to Atlanta

The Chicago Cubs have been nothing shy of terrible this season. That’s why it’s not surprising to hear that Derrek Lee, who has spent the last five years with the Cubs, may be getting traded to the Atlanta Braves. The Cubs are currently 20 games under .500 and 18 1/2 games back in the NL Central. If I were Lee, I’d want out of there as fast as I could.

The Cubs looked like they might be able to turn things around after the All-Star break until then they got slapped around by the Rockies and Brewers.  It’s possible that Lee blocked the trade with the Angels in July because he was still holding out hope that their luck would turn.  However, it’s hard to stay positive and win ballgames when it seems like your own manager has given up on your team.

I think getting away from the Cubs would be a smart decision for Lee.  Chicago’s season is practically over and he would at least have a shot at a World Series ring if he went to the Braves.  That should be all that matters at this stage in his career.  Lee has done the best he could to help the Cubs, but you can’t expect one player to do it all.  The Cubs are full of talent.  They just couldn’t get it together this year to make it work.  I think D-Lee will find himself much happier in the Atlanta sun, with a chance to contend for a championship, than he would be in Chicago knowing the other side of town is fighting for one too.

Cubs working on deal to send Lee to Braves [Chicago Breaking Sports]

Torii Hunter Being Torii Hunter

Unfortunately for Adrian Beltre, the Anaheim Angels have been playing Torii Hunter in right field for the first time since like 1999.  Combine that with the fact that the right field wall in Fenway Park comes up to most outfielders’ waists, and you’ve got a situation where it’s extremely difficult to hit a home run to that part of the ballpark.  Check out the video of Torii Hunter robbing Adrian Beltre of a home run.  Certainly not Torii’s best work, but I hate when announcers say an outfielder robbed a guy of a homer when the ball wouldn’t have even gone out.  This, on the other hand, was a clear-cut big fly:

Video Credit: YouTube user dbidown74CA

Strasburg Throws Heat at Bryce Harper

Stephen Strasburg and Bryce Harper could easily become the faces of the Washington Nationals for many years to come if they live up to the hype that has surrounded them already.  Despite giving Nationals fans a slight scare with his shoulder problem this season, Strasburg has already exceeded expectations.  The 17-year-old Harper, on the other hand, has yet to sign with Washington while a deadline of midnight on Monday looms.

Considering Scott Boras represents both Strasburg and Harper, we might expect Strasburg to be supportive of Harper’s contract situation.  That doesn’t seem to be the case.  Here are the strong words Strasburg had for Harper when asked if he had any advice for the 17-year-old, courtesy of the Washington Post:

I don’t have any advice for him,” Strasburg said. “It’s his decision. If he wants to play here, he’s going to play here. He doesn’t need advice from anyone to confirm his views. If he doesn’t want to play here, then we don’t want him here. That’s the bottom line.”

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Orlando Cabrera Is the $2 Million Batboy

It may just look like a little kid handing the umpire a bottle of water, but that actually is Reds shortstop Orlando Cabrera with the “BB” on his back. Orlando’s been out since August 3rd with an oblique injury but he decided he would lend the team a helping hand on Sunday at home against the Marlins. Cabrera held all the batboy responsibilities, getting foul balls, giving umpires the new balls, and keeping the on-deck circle stocked with pine tar and donuts. We’ve always known that Cabrera was a team player but who knew he would take it this far?

If coaching doesn’t work out after his playing career is up, at least Orlando has some experience in another field.

On DL, Cabrera passes time as Reds’ batboy [Reds.com]
Photo Credit: Jamieblog on Twitter

Gerald Laird Succeeds at Pissing Off Armando Galarraga

It’s so ironic how Detroit Tigers pitcher Armando Galaragga was unfazed by Jim Joyce’s blown call that ruined his perfect game yet something so simple as teammate Gerald Laird’s words pissed him off. Apparently Galaragga was not on the same page as catcher Alex Avila during his first inning of work on Sunday against the White Sox. Galaragga approached Avila in the dugout after the inning and fellow catcher Gerald Laird came to his rescue. Or told Galaragga to shove it. Or something else because whatever it was caused Galaragga to have the same reaction people expected him to have after Joyce’s blown call. Check out this video of Armando Galaragga and Gerald Laird fighting in the Tigers dugout courtesy of Detroit 4 Lyfe:

Laird admitted after the game that he said something he shouldn’t have said but it’s still shocking to see Galarraga get enraged. What happened to that exemplary sportsmanship we all praised? If anything, maybe the Tigers could use the spark. At 57-60, they sure could stand to play with a little fire.

Armando Galarraga Goes After Alex Avila And Gerald Laird In Dugout (video) [Detroit4Lyfe]
Battling Tigers rally past White Sox [Detroit Free Press]
Video Credit: YouTube user BobBiscigliano

John Sterling Botches Austin Kearns Home Run Call … Yeah Baby, Yeah!

John Sterling is the voice of the Yankees on the radio. Apart from his disgusting press box habits, Sterling is well known for his signature calls. More concerned with schtick than content, Sterling has a specific home run call for each one of the Yankees players. For instance, his current calls include “it’s an a-bomb, for A-Rod,” “tex message, you’re on the Mark, Teixeira,” and “Robbie Cano, don’t you know!” Sterling’s calls are so anticipated that many fans and media members speculate on what Sterling’s home run call will be for a player when the Yankees acquire somebody new.

Well the Yanks acquired outfielder Austin Kearns from the Indians at the trade deadline and it took almost two weeks before Kearns hit his first home run in pinstripes. It took Kearns so long, and the power was so unexpected, that the hack was caught off guard. He even forgot to use his line during the home run! Here’s a clip of how it sounded:

Concentrating more on the action and less on the scripting is better for everyone. Thank you.