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Marquise Hill’s Mother’s Home was Burglarized During the Funeral

Of all the low, disgusting, horrendous things I’ve ever heard, this has to rank right up there. What kind of a lowlife person(s) could bring themselves to burglarize a home because they knew the entire family and town would be gone for the funeral? How can you live with yourself for such a thing? That’s not some genius planning to be proud of; that’s a hideous mindset to be ashamed of.

$16,000 worth of items were taken from the home during the funeral, including a TV and laptop. Not only do you have the death of your son to grieve, but you now have to make a trip to Best Buy to pick up some new electronics. I have really no other words to express how deplorable some people’s actions can be. Honestly, how can you live with yourself after doing something like that?

(via MDS at FanHouse)

Want to Buy Jack Lambert’s Cigarette?

Mondesi’s House did a nice job pointing out this story a few days ago, but it wasn’t until I caught it at Our Book of Scrap that I read about it. Right up there with purchasing Luis Gonzalez’s used chewing gum, you can bid on a used Jack Lambert cigarette. No joke. Here’s the description on Ebay:

“WHEN I WAS OUTSIDE THE HOTEL MAKING SMALL TALK W/HIM WHILE HE WAS SMOKING HE THROUGH THIS BUTT ON THE GROUND & I GRABBED IT BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE COLLECTABLE. HE SMOKED A FEW OTHER TIMES BUT HE PUT THOSE IN THAT LONG TUBE TYPE TRASH CAN OUTSIDE PLACES THEY PUT FOR BUTTS. IF YOU HAVE A PHOTO OF CARD OF LAMBERT,THIS WOULD BE COOL TO FRAME W/IT AS A CONVERSATION PIECE, YOU GET THE BUTT & THE SHERATON NAPKIN”

Hope you caught this soon, auction’s ending today!

Just Who Is John Sanatana

From the East Valley Tribune:

Sorry, I just had to post that. If you can’t already figure it out, really dumb, moronic mistakes when it comes to screwing up the names of baseball players bother me. And that’s ignoring the moronic shmuck who would actually compare Carmona to the great Johan Santana. Not to say Carmona isn’t good, but please wake me when Carmona strikes out 12 next time out. Thanks.

David Kircus Will Punch Your Lights Out (Allegedly)

Kind of like hearing about a kicker talking trash, or a punter attempting murder, I’m pretty shocked when I read stories about backup return specialists getting into trouble with the law. Maybe it’s their way of taking out the aggression from not being a starter. Whatever the reason, Broncos backup WR and part-time return specialist, David Kircus, is a “person of interest” in an alleged assault case.

Grayson Robinson, sheriff of Arapahoe County, said his investigators were planning to bring Kircus in for a photo lineup Sunday night or this morning.

The victim suffered multiple broken facial bones in the alleged assault and was taken to Sky Ridge Medical Center in Lone Tree for surgery.

This is like meat on a hoof for all you race-baiters out there. It’s a white NFL player in trouble for an alleged assault. And from the sounds of things, he sure beat some ass. Maybe he’s just trying to carve out a niche in today’s NFL. Lord knows he sure has some competition.

Manchester Soccer Player Will Make you look like Elephant Man

I really have no idea what that means. It’s just enough of a challenge to get me to post on soccer, let alone figure out the freakin parlance of Britain. But here, because it’s kind of funny, Manchester City’s Joey Barton was arrested.

The 24-year-old England midfielder was arrested on suspicion of assault after being quizzed by officers at a Greater Manchester police station.

French international Dabo, 30, claims he was attacked during a practice session at City’s Carrington training ground on May 1.

He asked officers to investigate the incident, which he said left him looking like the `Elephant Man’ and needing hospital treatment.

Yeah, so about that whole Elephant Man treatment, I’m not so sure. Where I come from, serious punishment is making a man do the Elephant walk, so I have no idea what this Dabo guy is complaining about. Oh those cheeky Brits. And damn, whatever are they going to do not having Barton for their friendly against Albania? How will they win without him?

Macho Camacho Hates Computers

It’s actually quite the irony because I was having a discussion with a friend over email about the Mayweather Jr./De La Hoya fight, and check out the line he threw out there: “I really think boxing’s missing a personality. Even a Hector Macho at least had a little flair…” Well, turns out Macho Camacho has more than just a flair for personality (and check out his curl in the picture, that trademark was tight). Dudes heading to the slammer for busting up a computer store.

A warrant was issued for Camacho on Dec. 22, 2004, for a November burglary of a computer store. He was arrested in January 2005 on the burglary charge, and was also charged with drug possession after police allegedly found ecstasy in his hotel room at the Imperial Palace. Trial on the drug charge is tentatively set for June.

Camacho had bought a laptop from the business but had left it there for work on technical problems. He was trying to retrieve his computer, his attorney, David Morrison, said. The break-in was “a momentary lapse in judgment,” he added.

Can you say drunk-much? Or high much? Kind of reminds of the scene from Office Space where Samir and Michael Bolton start stomping on their “going away present.” Gotta love the line from the attorney — a momentary lapse of judgment. Or stupidity. Whatev. Hector Camacho faces up to seven years in prison and up to a $10,000 fine, but he won’t wind up paying or serving a third of either. Gotta love that the judge sent him to jail because a bail bond man was having trouble tracking Macho down for two years. Guess Camacho took one too many blows to the dome during his day. Poor guy.

Old Man Orlando Cepeda Sure Likes to Party

He was busted for drugs big-time on Tuesday after being pulled over for speeding in California. I’ll let you check out the story I did for AOL’s FanHouse to explain all the details. Man, you have to see it. And keep in mind, he’s 69 years old!

While we’re at it, here are some other stories I’ve penned at FanHouse recently: