Imus Makes Adam Jones Into a Victim

The one thing I didn’t think was possible has happened. Somehow, in this entire messy situation, Adam Jones — the biggest perpetrator of crimes within the last two years — was made into a victim by Don Imus. That is just maddening. It just goes to show how clueless Imus really is, and how idiotic you can make yourself sound when you just shoot from the hip. I’m still trying to wrap my arms around this one. How could this whole thing result in Adam Jones saying he’s actually praying for someone else? Think about all the lives the man formally known as Pacman has ruined. And now you’re telling me that he feels bad for someone else and that he’s praying for them? Since when did Adam Jones become the moral police? And where does he get off being more credible and ethical than any other person on this planet?

And how about that lepton brain Imus who compounds an already insanely idiotic statement by sticking his foot even further down his mouth. How did he possibly make himself sound even dumber on Tuesday than he did on Monday? Just check out his statement when he said he was being sarcastic, “What people should be outraged about is that they arrest blacks for no reason,” Imus said Tuesday. “I mean, there’s no reason to arrest this kid six times. Maybe he did something once, but everyone does something once.” OK mister trying-to-cover-up-my-tracks-but-digging-a-deeper-hole. Do you have no idea about Adam Jones and all the trouble he caused in his past life as Pacman? Have you no clue about all the incidents at clubs the night before games? Or how about that shooting at the strip club that resulted in a man being paralyzed? Yeah, he sure was arrested for no reason, I have to agree, Imus. Apparently five seconds of research is too much to ask for from this clown. Someone, please, take the mic away from this guy. He knows not what he says.

Chris Henry’s Former House Vandalized

Typically I would have given the LBS Chris Henry update when the dude lost his home to foreclosure, but I figured I’d give him a break. Besides, I was kind of burnt out on foreclosures after Holyfield and Canseco struggled with their pads, not to mention the fact that Henry’s already been so generous as to provide nearly half of the site’s content. But this was so unfortunate — what did Chris Henry ever do to have his old place vandalized?

Cleanup crews have a lot of work on their hands after vandals set their sights on Chris Henry’s former house.

The bank bought the Florence home after the former Bengal lost it in foreclosure.

Crews came to the house Monday to find trash and paint all over the home and the glass and staircase destroyed.

Ian’s Property Cleanup and Lawn Service said the vandals struck between Sunday evening and Monday morning.

Well, he’s no longer the Bengals’ problem, and the house is no longer his problem, so who did this really impact? Nobody I guess. But it just seems like a big kick in the balls if you ask me. I’m guessing the people who did it were trying to make things tougher for Henry. Little did they know their efforts went to waste. And on top of everything, he’s out of the NFL. That’s just not good.

This Beautiful Body Took Steroids?

Imagine my surprise to come across this story today … apparently Terry Bradshaw told Dan Patrick last week that he took steroids. And no, it wasn’t to get his body in shape for his bucknekked soliloquy in Failure to Launch, either. The interview, which you can hear on at SI’s website (who says they’re not getting their money’s worth from DP?), revolves mainly around the difference in medical care from now to when Bradshaw played. He talked about how players used to play with concussions, saying that many athletes would never have been cleared to play in today’s day. That pretty much led into this comment:

“We did steroids to get away the aches and the speed of healing,” Bradshaw said. “My use of steroids from a doctor was to speed up injury, and thought nothing of it. … It was to speed up the healing process, that was it. It wasn’t to get bigger and stronger and faster.”

Bradshaw said the the guys would get the steroids injected by the doctors. And coming from a guy who couldn’t spell cat if you spotted him the “C” and the “A,” I don’t doubt that he didn’t realize the steroids were making him stronger. Also, after hearing the interview, I think Jim Haslett is vindicated from his comments that the 70s Steelers popularized steroids in the NFL. Maybe now the Rooney’s should send him an apology.

Pacman No Longer, Call Him Adam Jones

He’s pretty smart for a dumb guy, I’ll say that for him. When I’m writing up this story and attributing the proper tags to it, I have to go for the Pacman Jones tag in order to give all related previous news. If I respected his wishes and went straight with Adam, nothing would register on LBS and you’d be wondering who I was talking about. OK, so I was getting ahead of myself there. Point is that Adam Schefter reported Pacman Jones no longer wants to be addressed by his nickname, and instead wants to be called by his real name from now on — Adam Jones. That’s right, all you brazen fans out there can now burn their P. Jones jerseys — they’re worthless.

It’s a smart P.R. move coming out of the Jones camp (clearly I still haven’t decided if I’ll oblige his wishes). Jones is looking to bury the past and move on, it seems. He’s been reinstated by the league, traded to the Cowboys, and now he’s looking to grow up and rebuild his image. As much as I can’t stand what he’s done, I’m hopeful that this is one of many changes to come — all for the good. And I will oblige and call him Adam. Since I’m doing my part, he now has to do his by showing it’s not just a P.R. move, but an actual change in his character. Good to see he’s making strides in an effort to makeover his image. Now, I have one request as well: From now on, I’d like you all to call me Maestro.

Cowboys Screwing Terry Glenn?

I think I might have to go with Jerruh on this one. The Cowboys and Terry Glenn are in a spat right now over Glenn’s knee. Jerruh might have had the best line saying, “I paid him $5 million last year and we got four plays.” She Glenn had two knee operations last year and his season went to crap. So after dishing out big money for no production, Jerry’s understandably upset. Now he wants Glenn to sign a waiver saying he’ll only get $500k instead of his $1.75 million if his knee gets hurt again. Glenn doesn’t want to sign, saying that’s bullcrap, and has instead asked for his release. While Jerruh got in a good zinger, Glenn came back with one of his own:

“I want who I’m playing for to want me to be playing for them. .. I will get my freedom and play for someone who didn’t talk me into postponing surgery last season and then hold it over my head the next.”

Well yeah, they asked you to postpone it because they wanted some production from you this year, what do you expect? And for the record, when the story did come out, it was that Glenn decided to postpone the surgery, not that the team asked him to do so. But yeah, I’ll go with Jerruh on this one. Glenn apparently collected big bucks last year for doing nothing, maybe he should feel indebted to the team. Would a guy coming off two knee surgeries who can’t pass a physical get more than $500k from another team? Well, there are the Raiders, and they could use another receiver right about now.

Role Reversal: Agent Leaves Player

Not exactly something you see everyday, not that I follow the scene too closely. Usually it’s the player leaving the agent in search of greener pastures — or golden nuggets, shall I say. Sometimes a player leaves an agent because he wants to pursue a Hollywood angle and get some representation that specializes in TV and media appearances. Whatever the reason, it’s usually the player leaving the agent. After all, what kind of message does it send to clients if agents are walking away from their clients? Not a good one, especially if that agent has dreams of ever signing clients in the future. That’s why it was so strange to read what Florio posted at Pro Football Talk. Apparently Rams running back Steven Jackson was fired by his agent, Gary Uberstine.

The report comes from Sports Business Journal, and what makes this story increasingly strange is that Jackson’s entering a contract year. Why would an agent walk away from sure millions? Florio adds some other interesting notes:

This isn’t the first time that Jackson has been involved in an eyebrow-raising situation when it comes to his agent. Jackson’s first agent was Rocky Arceneaux, who also represented at the time Marshall Faulk, the incumbent starter when Jackson was picked by the Rams in round one of the 2004 draft. The conflict of interest was palpable, but Arceneaux continued to represent both men. He was criticized privately in league circles for the value of the initial contract that he negotiated for Jackson.

If that’s the case, then Jackson sure is a weird one when it comes to an agent. How do you sign with the guy that represents your competition for the starting gig? This story just seems way too weird, I’d really like to hear more on it. I can’t even think of a reason why an agent would leave a player set to make millions.

Marcus Vick Avoids the Spotlight

It’s almost like a law. If you are a member of the Vick family, you must have a brush with local authorities at least once a year or they remove you from the lineage and strip you of your last name. Marcus Vick continued to prove why he’s Michael’s younger brother, getting arrested for DUI on Friday. The best part was that Vick was initially stopped by a bicycle cop because he was having an issue with a female. Showing complete disdain for a bicycle cop — as well he should — he sped off before finally being chased down minutes later.

Not one for bland times, Marcus failed a field sobriety test (apparently he doesn’t talk to Cedric Benson), and was charged with DUI, misdemeanor eluding police, reckless driving, driving on the wrong side of the word, and driving with a suspended license. That is quite the laundry list of activities. Talk about an exciting Thursday night. And I thought things were bad when he flashed a gun at a McDonald’s to kids who were making fun of him. Boy did I underestimate Mr. Vick. By the way, I wonder what he’s doing to support himself these days.