Larry Brown Sports

In case you haven’t seen it yet (don’t worry, only about 97 million have), Reebok released a commercial immediately after the Giants won the Super Bowl starring the ’72 Dolphins. It was a great commercial showing the Dolphins partying it up in a city called “Perfectville, established 1972, population 1.” Then there was a gift sent from Eli Manning to Mercury Morris telling him he could enjoy perfection for another year. Might as well watch the entire Perfectville commercial to refresh your memory it’s so good. Well, I had two questions about the commercial. One, did they have several versions of the commercial based on who won the MVP award (and is that why the gift was from Eli)? The second question, and the most important, is what happened to the version of the commercial had the Patriots won the game? Follow me here for a moment.

There’s no way a company spends all sorts of money buying adtime and filming a commercial only to have it work “in the small chance the Giants win.” Clearly they filmed at least two versions of it, ready to roll it out as soon as the game ended depending on the victor. Here is the alternate Perfectville commercial Reebok probably thought it would wind up playing:

Perfectville, Population 2. Gotta love it.

I realize I just set you up as if I had a punchline coming. Sorry to disappoint. There will be no punchline. Instead, I will share a few anecdotes from an article on Rick Majerus in this week’s issue of Sports Illustrated. In the article it was mentioned several times that Majerus is quite the exhibitionist and that his behavior towards his players isn’t too far off from what you’d see out of Bobby Knight. From the article:

Another player remembers Majerus calling him up to his hotel room on various occasions, and “he’d answer the door in his towel and I’d come in and the towel would fall off and it was like nothing had happened. He’d just be standing there buck naked. One year he had this lower-back injury, and he would have the trainer massage it with the ultrasound. But instead of just lowering his pants a little bit, Majerus would pull his pants down to his ankles and sit in a chair and coach us. Sometimes he’d be like, ‘Guys, bring it in, take a knee.’ We’d come in, and we’re just like, No way this is happening.”
…
Majerus kept telling [former Utah player Michael] Doleac that he needed to keep six inches between himself and his opponent in the post. When Doleac was caught shortly after leaning on his man, the coach erupted. “‘Jesus ****in Christ, Doleac! When a guy catches the ball in the post, you gap him six inches!’” Doleac recalls Majerus yelling. “Then he turns to the guys sitting on the baseline and says, ‘Six f***** inches,’ and he says, ‘the size of the average white d***!’ and pulls it out.”

The imagery is just simply incredible, is it not? Who knew this about Majerus? I had no clue. And frankly, I’m not sure I ever wanted to know that information.

Wow Tony, it’s getting tough to keep up with you. Last year there were rumors of you dating Jessica Simpson, but you put those to rest. Next it was Carrie Underwood. Most recently, it was hottie Sophia Bush. Then there was the whole Britney Spears incident. And now back with Chestica? At least that’s what In Touch Weekly is saying:

It was the day after Thanksgiving but Jessica Simpson’s family was more than happy to hold off their dinner so she could return home with her new boyfriend, Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo.

The couple showed up at Jessica’s grandparents new home in Waco, Texas, on November 23 (a day late, since Tony had a game to play on Thanksgiving) and received a “heroe’s” welcome from Joe and Tina Simpson and Jessica’s grandparents, according to an onlooker. While Tony has denied reports that he and Jessica are dating, insiders say the pair are definitely involved and they’re getting more serious.

Tony, you’re quickly establishing yourself as the Derek Jeter of the NFL. But hey man, whatever works, you know? Brady’s nailing a super model and setting records, Romo’s kicking ass and working Jessica. Hmm, maybe that’s just what Eli is missing …

UPDATE: Romo and Simpson are officially dating and were even photographed on vacation together in Mexico.

Longtime readers of the site are probably familiar with Rachel Specter. Yes, she’s the hottie from the RGX commercials you see airing constantly on ESPN while you’re watching sports. She’s been working on several movies this summer, and is set to appear in the October issue of Maxim. Luckily for us, I was able to run her down for an interview. We talked about her career, how she landed the commercials, and how her life and popularity has changed since starring in the commercials. Our conversation follows:

How did you get the RGX gig in the first place?

I always wanted to act and grew up doing whatever I could do in Tampa Florida, which is not very much. When I was in college, I spent a couple summers in New York and interned at a talent agency and learned about the whole industry. As soon as I graduated, I moved to LA. I started the way that most people started who didn’t really have any connections because I didn’t know one single person in LA. I started sending head shots and went through the process of trying to get an agent and then started auditioning. With the commercials, I had done a bunch of national commercials before this so this audition was just like any other audition. I went to it and ended up getting it. For the first audition, I read that they had six commercial spots and you had to read all of them. Then it was funny at the callback a lot of these things that you go to you see different versions of yourself just like all these girls that kind of look similar to you. So it was like walking into a room with all these pretty brunette girls. And I ended up getting it which was awesome because it’s been really great for me.

Read The Rest of the Story…

This is one of the better stories I’ve seen all year — it definitely has the potential to be one of LBS’ Greatest Hits. As my buddy Andy pointed out to me, the Oregon Duck has been suspended for opening up a can on the Houston Cougar mascot last week and will miss next weekend’s game at Autzen Stadium. What could he have possibly done that was so bad? See for yourself:

You see him go all Ace Ventura on the Cougar? Plus that WWF elbow drop was fantastic. As if the elbow drop wasn’t enough, then the Duck straight up tea-bagged the Cougar. I’m still laughing. That was pure beauty. Possibly the greatest thing I’ve seen all year. And it least it’s a lot more tame than mascots break dancing against each other.

It’s Charles Barkley, so is it really shocking when he says something anymore? The guy raced an aging NBA official, sealed it with a kiss, and he followed that up by pissing off the entire Bay Area. So the man of many words was being interviewed on NESN to talk about the Celtics additions of Ray Allen and Kevin Garnett (which I admit I never thought would happen). Check out what he said about the new look Celtics:

You know the Celtics, their uniforms have gotten better. And they got a better looking team, because in the 80s, with McHale, Bird, and Parish, they had the ugliest team in NBA history. They had Bill Walton [he] was ugly too. I think their team is much better looking with Paul and Ray and Kevin. But their uniforms have gotten better and their team has gotten much better looking in the 2000s.

Not as if Charles Barkley is the foremost representative on looks and fashion, but I have to admit, that is pretty freaking funny. I swear, nothing is out of bounds when it comes to Sir Charles. I guess that’s what makes him great.

The mystery behind the infamous Brian Urlacher photo has finally been solved. The chick from the picture with the incredibly … large … eyelashes, happens to be Erin from the VH1 show Rock of Love.

According to her bio, she is from Bloomington, Illinois, and was Miss Hooters of Illinois 2002 — which her small town police chief father should be proud of.

Urlacher dated Paris Hilton in the past, and now he’s dating Jenny McCarthy.

He’s not the only athlete to score a Playboy bunny. Let’s take a look at the list:

Alex Rodriguez dating ex-Playmate Torrie Wilson
Tyler Seguin getting cozy with Playmate Ciara Price
Evan Longoria dating Playmate Jaime Edmondson
Hunter Pence dating Playmate Shannon James

UPDATE: Rumors say Venus Williams and Hank Kuehne might be engaged!

Something tells me that I’ve seen this news somewhere before, but now that she’s at Wimbledon (and advancing to the 4th round), the pics are all over. Bossip tells me that Venus is going with this Hank Kuehne character who pocketed just over 10k on the Nationwide Tour as a golfer (and $2.6 mil on the PGA Tour as Curt in the comments points out). Now he has the pleasure (?) of traveling first class around the world and nailing Venus Williams at night. Yikes. He’s also reportedly divorced, carrying some baggage. So where and how did these two get together? There are some questions that just may never go answered. This might be one of them.

Other Venus Williams Stories:
Venus Williams Graduates from Fashion School!

Serena Williams Stories:
Serena Williams Posing Nude!
Serena Williams Is Yoked

They’ve had so many of them I just figured it was about time to have a little fun with their arrests. Without further ado, here’s a list of the Bengals’ finest, from best to worst.

1. Chris Henry (June 14th, ’06) – providing alcohol to three underaged females, but did he score?
2. Chris Henry (Jan. 28th, ’06) – possession of a concealed firearm, improper exhibition of firearm, aggravated assault with firearm, that’s a lot of firearm action
3. A.J. Nicholson (June 3rd, ’06) – burglary, vandalism, grant theft, *bonus points for stealing electronics from a teammate, that’s not easy
4. Frostee Rucker (June 21st, ’06) – vandalism, spousal battery, just don’t beat up that blackberry
5. Reggie McNeal (Dec. 3rd, ’06) – resisting arrest and drug possession, always fun to catch the cops with an elbow to the chest
6. Eric Steinbach (Aug. 5th, ’06) – boating under the influence, admit it, you didn’t even know that counted
7. A.J. Nicholson (May 18th, ’06) – domestic violence, he restarted the streak after they had gone four months in between arrests
8. Chris Henry (June 3rd, ’06) – DUI, 0.092, I’d blow that from a sip of Manischweitz
   
9. Odell Thurman (Sept. 25th, ’06) – drunken driving, a 0.18, but he was more sober than Chris Henry or Reggie McNeal, so it’s all good
10. Deltha O’Neal (Dec. 9th, ’06) – DWI, come on a 0.10 shouldn’t even count
    
11. Matthias Askew (July 22nd, ’06) – disorderly conduct, resisting arrest, failure to comply with police officer’s order, obstructing justice, kinda boring
12. Chris Henry (Dec. 15 ’05) – weed possession, just kids being kids
    
13. Quincy Wilson (June 17, ’07) – disorderly conduct, kind of weak, but cool that the bride and groom were arrested too

Upset over what he says was a frame job by Kobe’s legal team to serve as a media diversion during Bryant’s trial, alleged former bodyguard Patrick Graber is striking back. He is releasing a book called Dead Women Tell No Tales: the truth about the Kobe Bryant Rape Case. Judging by the online book, Graber does not hold back one bit. Here are some of the notable aspects of what the book touches on.

Graber says Bryant had several other mistresses and that Kobe wanted to put the hit on the witness:

Graber and Bryant meet in July 2003 in Kobe’s luxury apartment in Westwood where the player is being entertained by two of his mistresses. Bryant proposes to his bodyguard to eliminate the witness in the Colorado rape case.

Graber says Kobe was a player with the ladies:

The bodyguard observes firsthand the superstar’s bizarre infidelities with several women at the same time.

Graber says Kobe fit right in with the NBA image:

Exposure of Bryant’s true character away from the basketball court and how he fits into the disturbing NBA culture where social norms seem to be inexistent and violence against women commonplace.

Graber says he was framed:

Graber and Bryant’s head of security meet. Kobe changes his plan and Revilla orchestrates Graber’s entrapment and arrest to divert the media attention away from the Colorado rape case thus improving Bryant’s damaged public image.

There is also a testimonial on the about page from a man named Jondell R. Montgomery of Long Beach, brace yourself:

The account of Kobe participating in orgies and the description of the surroundings is accurate. A attended a few of those parties myself…

Wow, does Graber sure have an axe to grind here. The truth behind the contents of the book are debatable. But as is the case with most things, there has to be some correctness to it. And from the descriptions by Graber, Kobe seems just as like the crook he was made out to be in Colorado. The question then becomes whether or not people will take this book seriously. If so, how much will this damage Kobe’s reputation which seems to have been patched up? Secondly, does he stand to lose fans and endorsement dollars because of the book? Only time will tell. But giving my opinion, I’ve always though Kobe was a punk, and everything that is coming out in this book supports that sentiment.

Thanks to Young, Black, and Fabulous for bringing the book to my attention.