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Fabrice Muamba on being dead for 78 minutes: It was ‘blackness’

Bolton midfielder Fabrice Muamba is now back home after collapsing from a cardiac arrest during a match last month that left him effectively dead for 78 minutes.

The 24-year-old former star for England’s U-21 team crashed to the pitch at the 41st minute of an FA Cup match against Tottenham. The incident left him briefly in a coma and hospitalized for 40 days. His remarkable recovery has surprised even his own doctors. In an interview with The Sun, his first public comments since collapsing, he recalls in chilling detail the frightening and “surreal” moments when his heart stopped.

“I ran upfield to try to get on the end of a cross from Martin Petrov on our left wing and as I ran back into midfield I felt very slightly dizzy,” Muamba said. “It wasn’t normal dizziness — it was a kind of surreal feeling like I was running along inside someone else’s body. It’s hard to explain. … Then I made another burst forward and noticed it again — that dizzy feeling again. But then my vision started to go.

“I had no pain whatsoever. No clutching at my chest or tightness like you see when people have heart attacks in movies. Just an odd feeling that’s impossible to explain. … Then I started to see double. It felt almost like a dream. There was no one anywhere near me when I started to feel myself falling. The last thing I heard was our defender Dedryck Boyata screaming at me to get back to help out in defense. … He obviously had no idea what was happening to me and neither had I.

“I just felt myself falling through the air then felt two big thumps as my head hit the ground in front of me then that was it. Blackness, nothing. I was dead.”

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RG3 makes embarrassing Twitter mistake with Alex Morgan

Alex Morgan is a popular gal. That’s especially the case on Twitter, where some of her thousands of adoring fans often attempt some harmless (and hopeless) flirting with the soccer star. (She’s taken, fellas. But, hey, we don’t blame you for trying.) But at least those fans know what she looks like. Can’t say the same for Robert Griffin III when he tried to jump on the Alex Morgan bandwagon this week.

Observe:

Oh, well this is nice. Honestly, who isn’t an RGIII fan? Well, other than Von Miller.

Shameless tweet by Griffin. But this is Alex Morgan we’re talking about. Can’t say we blame him. Let’s see how she responds.

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DeAngelo Hall flirts with Alex Morgan on Twitter, Morgan says she’ll attend Redskins game

Hopefully once word gets around that DeAngelo Hall and Alex Morgan were chatting back and forth on Twitter, everyone calls it flirting. That way we can see if Hall gets all worked up about it like Evan Longoria did that time when he and Morgan were chatting and everyone said he was trying to pick her up. It’s just more fun when that happens. Anyway, Hall recently tweeted back and forth with the U.S. Women’s soccer star, and by the end of the conversation he convinced her to attend a Redskins game next season. Either Morgan knows nothing about football, or she has high hopes for what the Robert Griffin III era might bring.

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Phil Scolari: People don’t like Cristiano Ronaldo because he has sex with so many women

Because he is one of the most popular athletes in the world, Cristiano Ronaldo is also one of the most hated. Fans of rival soccer clubs loathe Ronaldo for a number of reasons, including but not limited to the fact that they’re threatened by his ability and hate his cocky attitude. If you ask Cristiano himself, he might tell you that the haters get on him because he’s so handsome and wealthy.

Former Chelsea and Portugal manager Phil Scolari agrees with Ronaldo, albeit in a slightly more detailed manner.

“Some people do not like him because he is a great player, good-looking and has sex with all the ladies,” Scolari told SporTV Arena according to Sambafoot. “People get jealous. As a person he is spectacular, wonderful. He works socially like no other. He’s a good team-mate, a great footballer, and a great friend.”

Scolari also said that if it weren’t for that damn Lionel Messi, Ronaldo would be all set. Unfortunately, Messi has done a good job of stepping all over the whole “Ronaldo is the best in the world” thing.

“The only bad thing about Cristiano’s life is Messi,” Scolari continued. “If it wasn’t for Messi, Cristiano would be the best player in the world for five consecutive years.”

If only, if only. If you have to be hated by a large amount of people, it might as well be because you get so much action. There are surely a few people out there that would argue that they hate Ronaldo because he’s an actor on the pitch, but he’ll probably stick with the sex thing. It makes him sound cooler.

H/T Dirty Tackle
Photo credit: Kyle Terada-US PRESSWIRE

Silvio Berlusconi allegedly had a stripper perform in a Ronaldinho mask

If you’re on top of current world affairs, you’ll know AC Milan owner and former Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi is currently on trial for allegedly having sex with an underage prostitute.

At said trial for said unsavory allegations one model took the stand Monday against the former Italian leader and revealed lurid and, at times, bizarre details of Berlusconi’s “bunga bunga” parties (read: sex parties). Imane Fadil testified about her first party, during which the prime minister told her “Don’t be offended” and gave her 2,000 euros. She alleges to have seen models stripping out of nun costumes that night for Berlusconi. Later in her testimony, Fadil recounted this disturbing image, via AFP:

At another party Fadil said she saw a young Brazilian model “with an AC Milan jersey and a Ronaldinho mask, who stripped down to her thong.”

Ronaldinho, a former FIFA World Player of the Year, joined Milan in 2008 and left for Brazilian club Flamengo in 2011. I guess that’s when he just wasn’t doing it for Berlusconi anymore.

H/T Dirty Tackle
Photo credit: CSPA via US PRESSWIRE

Columbian soccer player Teofilo Gutierrez kicked off team, reportedly threatened teammates with a paintball gun

When Racing Club striker Teofilo Gutierrez was sent off during a 4-1 loss to Independiente on Saturday, he took with him his fourth red card since joining the team last February. He may not have known, however, that it would turn out to be his last. After he was kicked out of the game for insulting a referee, Racing Club was left a player short in a match that they were only trailing by a goal. Gutierrez’s teammates reportedly got on his case about receiving yet another red card and things turned ugly.

According to Reuters, Gutierrez threatened to shoot his teammates with a paintball gun in the locker room after the game. That’s right, a paintball gun. As a result, club president Gaston Cogorno says he will no longer be a part of the team. Gutierrez had scored 22 goals in 35 matches with the club.

Have you ever played paintball? Getting shot with a paintball gun hurts and can leave quite a welt, but Gutierrez’s threat wasn’t exactly up to Gilbert Arenas’ standards. That being said, it is further proof that this dude had several screws loose. Forget the four red cards in slightly over a year — who keeps a paintball gun on them in the locker room?

H/T Dirty Tackle

Alex Morgan’s boyfriend says the two are ‘going to be together for a very long time’

Sorry if you were one of the thousands of eager males who sent marriage proposals to Alex Morgan during the World Cup — you don’t have a chance — if her boyfriend has anything to say about it, that is.

Servando Carrasco has been together with Morgan since the two played soccer at Cal together in college. Though the two were in opposite parts of the country playing professionally, they said Skype was the key to their relationship. And even though Morgan has exploded in popularity — she’s thrown out the first pitch at an MLB game and posed in Sports Illustrated’s swimsuit edition — the two are still together.

Carrasco helped organize a deal for Morgan to be traded to Seattle so they could play in the same city. He also told The Seattle Times he sees the two staying together regardless of how much attention Morgan gets.

“In my eyes, she’s the same girl that I met in college. Nothing’s changed in our relationship,” Carrasco said. “We’re going to be together for a very long time. She’s a very down-to-earth girl. She doesn’t let all of the attention get to her.

“She’s been so successful lately, but she still has that same work ethic. The sky’s the limit for her, and I think the Olympics coming up is going to be a great stage for her. I’m sure she’s going to do some amazing things this summer. There’s a lot of opportunities coming up for her and I’m extremely proud of her.”

Carrasco’s comments are not surprising. Last September, Morgan even said all the attention she was receiving was a little weird, so it’s no surprise to hear she hasn’t changed.