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U.S. Soccer Players Teal Bunbury and Juan Agudelo Do The Dougie (Video)

In 2010, we saw The Dougie take over as the dance of choice for professional athletes. Braylon Edwards gave us a pretty good rendition, but John Wall’s had to be the most memorable of the year, while Drew Stanton and Reid Brignac were less-than-impressive in their attempts. We can now add U.S. Soccer players Teal Bunbury and Juan Agudelo to the list of athletes who would have been better off skipping The Dougie. After Bunbury scored on a penalty kick in the National Team’s friendly against Chile, he and Teal did one of the worst versions of the dance to date:

I guess trying has to count for something, but maybe next time they should just slide head first or river dance or whatever it is soccer players usually do to celebrate.

Thanks to flashboy2010 for the video.

David Beckham Interested in Returning to Premier League, Tottenham Hotspur

Four years, three tattoos, two prostitute allegations, and one ankle injury ago, David Beckham left the Spanish League to come to the Los Angeles Galaxy of the MLS. Beckham had his ups-and-downs with the Galaxy and went on loan to Milan twice, but he’s back in Los Angeles. Becks is now 35 and recovering from an achilles injury, and it appears as if he wants to return to the Premier League in England for a few months before the Galaxy’s season begins in March.

In a “what are the odds?” story, Beckham reportedly ran into a former Tottenham Hotspurs player while shopping at Harrods department store for gifts. Beckham reportedly told Jamie Redknapp, whose father helps run the Spurs, he was interested in returning to the Premier League and playing for Tottenham. There appears to be mutual interest between the two.

If Beckham wants to return to the Premier League, the Galaxy and MLS can let it happen by loaning him to Tottenham, as they’ve done twice with Milan. Beckham had said if he returned to the Premier League it would be with Manchester United, but the Reds likely don’t have interest in him. Becks played for Tottenham Hotspurs’ youth team before joining Manchester United, and he could see his schedule get packed if he ends up loaned out to Tottenham.

Cristiano Ronaldo Takes an Embarrassing Dive Against AC Milan (Video)

This is why people in America make fun of soccer.  You can call it ignorant, arrogant, misinformed, ill-informed, or whatever you want to call it, but these are the images that are burned into the minds of people who hate on soccer.  I’d rather see Cristiano Ronaldo spitting at a cameraman than doing something like this.  Check out this video of Cristiano Ronaldo’s dive against AC Milan, courtesy of Deadspin:

The best is when a soccer fan uses the excuse of “that’s just part of the game.”  You’re right, it is, and you should be embarrassed that that’s the case.  I wish I could ref one of these matches just for a day.  I’d slap a red card on every player I saw doing something like this and maybe even force them to wear a blond wig for a game when they returned to action.  Actually, some of them would probably like that.

Video Credit: YouTube user Tperfew

Joseph Rimmer Tried to Run Ref Over With Car After Getting Red Card

Screaming at the ref when something doesn’t go your way is so last year.  There’s no need to publicly humiliate an official if he throws you out of a game when you have a perfectly good automobile waiting in the parking lot.  By that, I don’t mean leave the stadium quietly.  At least not if you’re British amateur soccer player Joseph Rimmer.

Out of Bounds has drawn our attention to a Liverpool Echo report that highlights Rimmer’s psychopathic meltdown during a match in Southport, England in which he was issued a red card.  Rimmer supposedly went to the parking lot after being sent off, got in his car, and drove it onto the field.  While his attorney would later claim Rimmer was just trying to have the game called off, the report indicates he was aiming for referee David Harkness.  Luckily, Harkness was able to get out of the way and was unharmed.

That’s a reasonable reaction, right?  Don’t like a call?  Don’t have a weapon?  Just try to kill the ref with your car.  You got thrown out of the game, so you might as well make use of the extra time you’ve been given.  I don’t know much about the British legal system, but if this guy doesn’t end up in jail I’d be shocked.  If he’s not considered a danger to society after a stunt like that I can’t imagine who would be.

Peruvian Soccer Players Drug Opponents, Slip Them Tranquilizers

I’m really starting to wonder if there’s a translation for the word “sportsmanship” in South America.  A couple weeks back, we brought you a story about the president of Bolivia kneeing an opponent in the man zone during a friendly exhibition.  Today, we have a story from another soccer match in South America — this time in Peru — that may be even more messed up.

According to a report we read over at Deadspin, players from the Peruvian soccer club Sport Ancash drugged their opponents from Hijos de Acosvinchos prior to a match that was supposed to promote the top tier of soccer in Peru.  That’s right, I said drugged.

The story goes that Acosvinchos accepted what they thought to be a friendly gesture from the Sport Ancash coach prior to the game.  The coach gave the Acosvinchos players a drink — which was supposedly in a beaker yet they still drank it — and told them it was an energy drink.  Some of the players started going down like sacks of potatoes minutes later.  Turns out the drinks were the exact opposite of an energy drink and contained tranquilizers.

We hear about teams playing pranks on one another and little tid bits of unsportsmanlike behavior all the time, but doing something like that is inexcusable.  If someone had turned out to be allergic to whatever was in the drinks or hurt them self badly when they collapsed I doubt anyone would be laughing.  Deadspin has a video explaining the incident, for those of you who understand Espanol.

By the way, is it wrong if I start referring to this act as a “Peruvian roofie?” Yes? Fine, I won’t do that.

Bolivian President Evo Morales Knees Soccer Opponent in the Balls (Video)

Now here’s something you don’t see every day — the president of a nation participating in a full on soccer match.  But you know what’s something you probably never see at all?  The president of a nation kneeing someone in the balls during said soccer game.  Yes, that actually happened in Bolivia and it could be the most unique nut shot video we’ve ever featured here at LBS.

Bolivian President Evo Morales decided to celebrate the opening of a new pitch in La Paz by participating in a “friendly” match between his ruling party and the opposing party.  Easy to see where that could go wrong, huh?  Check out the video of Bolivian President Evo Morales kneeing a player in the balls during a soccer game:

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Moroccan Goalie Celebrates a Bit Early

What appeared to be a timely save for keeper Khalid Askri ended up one of the worst cases of premature celebrating soccer has ever seen.  Maghreb Fez and FAR Rabat, two of Morocco‘s top division teams, were squaring off in a game that I have absolutely never heard of entitled the “Throne Cup” when Askri stopped a penalty kick — or did he?  He certainly thought he had, as he began walking away and kissing the logo on his shirt in celebration.  The ball, however, was not finished rolling.  Check out the video of a Moroccan goalie celebrating a penalty kick save too early, courtesy of SI Hot Clicks:

Worse than English goalie Robert Green’s miscue?  Nah, no way.

Source:
SI Hot Clicks 9/10