OK, so I’m a little hazy on all the details here, but as far as I understand things, Manchester United player Cristiano Ronaldo has a notorious lady friend. The girl in question is 26-year-old Brazilian hottie, Fernanda (do any of them have last names??), and apparently in addition to banging Ronaldo, she also peddles coke and serves as a hooker in her spare time. Sports by Brooks alerted me to the story that was uncovered by News of the World. Now how did News of the World confirm this story? That’s where this greatest job ever stuff comes in.

Apparently one of their writers was assigned the duty of pursuing an evening with Fernanda. He got her naked, got her to offer coke, documented the whole thing on video. He even got her to bring a friend, with whom Fernanda put on a show. Honestly, if this is what undercover reporting is all about, sign me up. Does anyone have a job application to the World? I’m not even joking. What I wouldn’t give to have an assignment where I’m getting a hooker naked. To see the whole documentation of the evening, including a NSFW pic of Fernanda, visit the News of the World site. Link includes NSFW pic. The pictures of Fernanda below however, are safe for work.

Agent Zero may have had his run of awful news lately — three knee surgeries in the last two seasons — but at least he’s going to bookend it with some good news. Gilbert Arenas will be marrying girlfriend Laura Govan, as he got engaged over the weekend. For some background info:

“Life is about growth and getting smarter about the choices we make,” Arenas said in an e-mail. “Being a husband and father will require both of those!”
…
They met in 2001, when he was a Golden State Warriors draft pick and she was doing PR for the Sacramento Kings. They split two years later but clearly stayed in touch: He was by her side when she delivered their daughter, Izela Semaya, in December 2005. And then a messy paternity dispute — lawyers, ducked subpoenas, the whole catastrophe — that they somehow worked through. He moved her to NoVa in ‘06, and in March ‘07, she had his son, Alijah Amani.

Gilbert has said before that he was off the market, so I’ll guess he was referring to Laura. The sad thing is Gilbert won’t be able to throw any blowout parties in his Playboy pool as a bachelor. What’s the point of having a pimped out pool like that if you can’t use it to your advantage? And one question: when he does get married, will Gilbert be hobbling to the alter on crutches?

I might not have wanted the man around when he was being discussed as a potential UCLA coach, but there’s no doubt he’s worked wonders with the Texas Tech program. He’s got a gimmick offense that spreads the ball around with a crazy passing game and produces results. Apparently Mike Leach isn’t just an offensive guru, he also has valuable dating advice. From The Wiz of Odds:

I like his line about taking a chick to the steakhouse where they don’t serve salad. He’s right on about that. Who knew that Leach was a suavecito?

Boy, this guy doesn’t cease to rip Vince Young. Worst part is, VY is too sensitive to the criticism. [SportsbyBrooks]

Partying on a boat with Vols fans is fun [The Sporting Blog]

Mike Golic Jr. busted for underage drinking [You Been Blinded]

Golic addresses the situation on Mike and Mike [Awful Announcing]

Is it the dawning of the Brady Quinn era in Cleveland? [Deadspin]

Which NFL team can run the table and go 0-16? [FanIQ]

Raider employee almost comes to blow with writer [The Meaningful Collateral]

A recap of the weekend at BlogWorld Expo [Hard for the Yard]

There’s no party like a Wrigleyville party after the Cubs clinch [Mouthpiece Sports]

It’s early, there’s still plenty of time to collapse, the Yankees and Red Sox will catch em. Heck, even the Blue Jays will pass them up. They’re hot right now, we’ll see how long it lasts. I probably said those words, or at least thought them, several times during the course of the year. Well, it’s late September, football season is in full swing, and the effing Rays just clinched their first ever spot in the postseason. From worst to first. From joke to legit. The Tampa Bay Rays started off strongly and didn’t let down. They went head up with the Red Sox several times down the stretch and prevailed. They absolutely earned their spot in the playoffs, and they’ll be a dangerous team, too. So how did they do it? How was their turnaround possible?

Read The Full Story…

I’ll be quick to admit that I’m not a huge college football fan and that my knowledge and enjoyment of teams and players is far more limited compared to my level of enthusiasm for other sports. That being said, I’m a huge fan of Knowshon Moreno and began to notice his brilliance last year during his freshman campaign. The guy is big, strong, runs fast, runs hard, can juke, can hurdle, can run you over — he’s the whole package. He’s a fantastic collegian and I expect him to be an incredible pro. If you don’t see what I’m talking about, then you need to check out the video of him hurdling the Central Michigan defender in the middle of a run. Well Knowshon just about performed an encore, scoring the first touchdown of the game against Arizona State, a nine-yard touchdown run in the 2nd quarter. Check it:

That dude was parallel to the ground he was so horizontal. He got like four or five feet of air on that one. Was he trying to score a touchdown or was he trying to set an Olympics record in the high jump? Moreno could probably give Adrian Wilson and Joey Gathright a run for their money. Interesting little tid bit: Moreno means “Brown” in Spanish. I think we’re distant cousins.