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Angry Alabama fan Phyllis calls Colin Cowherd ‘Cow-Turd’ in best radio call ever (Audio)

colin-cowherd-espnPaul Finebaum welcomed fellow ESPN Radio personality Colin Cowherd onto his radio show on Wednesday to discuss some SEC football. During their chat, Cowherd spoke about how he believes Auburn is better positioned for the immediate future than Alabama and will beat the Tide in Tuscaloosa next season en route to a BCS National Championship. This made a Bama fan named Phyllis very, very angry.

As Busted Coverage pointed out, Phyllis regularly calls Finebaum’s show to express her love for Nick Saban and company. On Wednesday, she went WWE on Cowherd by starting her epic rant off with a, “Hey Cow-Turd, let me tell you something!” Here’s the audio of the first part of Phyllis’ call, courtesy of Deadspin.

When Finebaum tried to defend Cowherd’s opinion, Phyllis continued to get increasingly irritated. I’ve listened to the clip below starting at the 1:30 mark about 10 times in a row now and I can’t stop laughing.

“The Crimson Tide and Saban will take care of their own. And anybody that wants to come up against ‘em, come on. They’re gunnin’ for you, they’re waitin’ on you. It’s not over, people! Alabama’s not over. We’ve only just begun. ROLL TIDE!”

And suddenly, I wish I was Paul Finebaum. That mic drop at the end of Phyllis’ rant was probably one of the top-five greatest things I’ve ever heard in my life. You thought that Tennessee fan who called her favorite radio station crying last month was a die-hard? She has nothing on Phyllis.

Jon Lester to Colin Cowherd: You couldn’t be more wrong about David Ortiz

David-Ortiz-rips-Buster-OlneyBoston Red Sox pitcher Jon Lester went on Colin Cowherd’s show on Friday to defend David Ortiz. Earlier this week, Cowherd spoke about Ortiz’s mind-boggling performance in the World Series and all but accused him of using performance-enhancing drugs. Lester seemed certain that is not the case.

“I think you couldn’t be more wrong about him,” Lester said. “I think the biggest thing with David is you really haven’t seen the power numbers spike up or anything like that. I think he’s just become more of a complete hitter. … It’s not like he’s going at there at 37 and all of a sudden he’s hitting 50 homers and driving in 140 (runs).

“He’s hitting his normal home run totals that he’s hit his entire career. His average has gone up, which I think is a result of him taking his walks and taking the base hits. I think Fenway Park is a good ballpark for him and fits him well and I think he’s done it the right way for a long time.”

Lester is right about that. Ortiz has hit somewhere in the vicinity of 25-30 home runs and 90-100 RBI for the past six seasons of his career — excluding stretches where he was injured. After hitting just .238 in 150 games in 2009, many assumed Big Papi was washed up. Instead, he enjoyed one of the best all-around statistical years of his career this season at age 37.

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Colin Cowherd insinuates that David Ortiz is using steroids

David-Ortiz-Against-One-Game-PlayoffWhat David Ortiz has accomplished through the first five games of the 2013 World Series is nothing shy of incredible. The 37-year-old slugger has carried the Boston Red Sox to a 3-2 series lead over the St. Louis Cardinals by going 11-for-15 from the plate (a .733 average), belting two homers and driving in six runs. He has reached base 15 out of 20 times he has strolled to the plate.

The Cardinals have not been able to get Big Papi out, and ESPN’s Colin Cowherd thinks he knows why. During the opening segment of his show on Wednesday, Cowherd basically said he believes Ortiz is currently using performance-enhancing drugs.

“David Ortiz, who was shot two years ago, is now Babe Ruth,” Cowherd said. “That’s a great story. And I don’t want to get in the way of that great story because it will make people really, really mad. … Last time I saw a guy like this it was Barry Bonds. But sports is about storytelling and hero worship and cool nicknames and fanaticism. Fans get mad when you derail that.”

[Related: Jon Lester defends David Ortiz against Colin Cowherd]

Ortiz’s power numbers have remained relatively consistent throughout his career with the Red Sox, but his .309 average this season was tied for the second-highest of his career for any season in which he appeared in at least 100 games. A historically slow starter, Ortiz came out of the gate red hot in 2013. In fact, a local sports writer insinuated back in May that Papi must be juicing.

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Dan Patrick calls out Colin Cowherd for not crediting him for Kurt Warner quotes

Dan Patrick frequently talks about his former employer, ESPN, (aka the “Mothership”), on his nationally syndicated and televised radio show, but he doesn’t often go after them as much as he did on Friday.

Patrick was upset that ESPN Radio morning talk show host Colin Cowherd seemed to rip him off without giving credit, and he called him out for it.

What happened is Patrick interviewed Kurt Warner on Thursday morning and asked the former quarterback-turned-analyst if he would want his children to play football given the dangers of the sport. Warner said he preferred if they didn’t, and was called out by another player for his opinion.

According to Awful Announcing, Cowherd had Warner on his show later in the morning (audio here). He started off the interview asking about the same subject.

“You know, Kurt, yesterday on the tragic death of Junior Seau one of the first things I thought about was the effect it’s going to have on the game long term and mothers and fathers saying, ‘you know what, I’m out.’ There’s no way I want my kids playing this game. You’ve got kids, where do you fall on that Kurt?” Cowherd asked.

Patrick viewed that as Cowherd trying to piggyback on a subject Patrick raised, but without giving Dan the proper credit. After Patrick called out Cowherd on his show Friday (audio in the video above), the ESPN personality responded to people questioning him over Twitter. Cowherd played dumb.

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Brock Lesnar Punks Colin Cowherd (Video)

This just in: Colin Cowherd has a big mouth. The thing that is particularly special about it is that Colin Cowherd knows Colin Cowherd has a big mouth. That’s what makes this so fun.  CBS should consider adding this little embarrassing moment to their sitcom about the life of Cowherd, because those of us who are annoyed by him might actually tune in when that episode airs.  The SportsNation gang decided to play an early April Fools joke on Cowherd earlier this week, and the result was fantastic.  Check out the video of Brock Lesnar punking Colin Cowherd, courtesy of Around the Octagon:

No wonder The Undertaker is trying to bait Lesnar back to the WWE and Big Foot Silva wants to send him there.  He obviously still does the pretending thing pretty well.  Seeing Cowherd crap himself like that was probably one of the most entertaining minutes I’ve ever experienced.

Eliza Dushku Lands Michelle Beadle Role in Colin Cowherd-Inspired CBS Show

Back in November we informed you of the sitcom CBS purchased the rights to a show based on the life of Colin Cowherd. Yes, we were as stunned as you were to hear they were making a show based on this guy. We were in even more shock when we learned that Damon Wayans was cast as the Cowherd role. Outside of the obvious skin color difference, it’s a perfect match.

Apparently the folks doing the casting at CBS also thought Eliza Dushku fit the Michelle Beadle role well because she was also hired. Dushku wrote on her Facebook Wednesday “It is with insanest excitement & awesomeness I get to finally fill you guys in: I’ve JUST landed a new CBS comedy pilot w/ my comic idol Mr. Damon Wayans! Stay tuned, there is a serious happy dance occurring at the moment ;)”

After the announcement was made, Dushku and Beadle exchanged tweets. Beadle, Cowherd’s co-host on ESPN’s Sports Nation show, said to Dushku “I’ve got to get you some black & silver Spurs gear!” Dushku responded by showing her fan loyalty, saying “Just threw up in my mouth, twice! Boston girl, Beadle: C’s, BoSox & Pats!”

The good news is Dushku seems like a fairly savvy sports fan, so that should help her in her role. But seriously, it really doesn’t matter too much because I can’t imagine this show gets picked up and lasts very long. I know, famous last words.

Thanks to Ben Maller for the heads up.

Colin Cowherd Sells Life Story to CBS in Sitcom Deal

No need to double check the URL — this is not The Onion. This is in fact a true story. Trust me, I had to quadruple check before I published this post and actually did more fact-checking than I have for any other story I’ve ever written. You read correctly: ESPN Radio host Colin Cowherd has apparently sold his life story to CBS which will turn it into a sitcom.

The Hollywood Reporter via The Sports Hernia provided the following details: “The Cowherd script sold as a multi-camera comedy to CBS, with writers Bill Martin and Mike Schiff attached (Hank, Grounded For Life), as well as executive producers Eric and Kim Tannenbaum (Two and a Half Men).”

Keep something in mind: just because the story was sold to CBS doesn’t mean this will ever appear on TV. CBS has purchased the rights to make a show based on Cowherd but we’re pretty far away from seeing it on TV. Still, what I don’t get is why anyone pays attention to this clown.

Cowherd says things just for the purpose of irritating and agitating people. When you hear b.s. coming out of someone’s mouth, why wouldn’t you just change the radio dial? That’s exactly what I do. Then again, I also zoom by at 70mph when I see a crash on the side of the freeway whereas most people slow down to check out the scene. Most people can’t help but be hooked by this garbage and it truly is pathetic. Actually, this show is billed as a comedy; it’s further confirmation that Cowherd’s goal is to be a joke.