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Joaquin Benoit Had to Remove a Bandage Because it Possessed Superhero Powers

If you’re wondering why baseball is not as popular as it used to be, it’s because they allow nonsense like this to go on:

Honestly, Joe Girardi? You made Joaquin Benoit remove a bandage from his face because it was large and too much of a distraction? Serves you right that he went 1.2 key innings late in the game without allowing a run. That’s what you get for bothering with such menial rubbish.

And while we’re on the subject of Joaquin Benoit, does anyone else think it would have been a good idea for Mark Teixeira to swing 3-0 in the 7th? During the regular season, taking the walk is the right move. But when you’re down to your final seven outs of the season and down by two, I want my slugger taking his best shot on a fastball piped right down the middle. That’s just me.

Anyway, leave it to David Wells to put the bandage idiocy into proper perspective:

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David Ortiz Does Not Flip Bat After Home Run Following Joe Girardi Complaints

David Ortiz has been extremely hot for the Red Sox lately, having hit in eight straight games. He has four home runs and 10 RBIs in that span, and he’s gone deep in both of Boston’s wins over the Yankees this week. Ortiz flipped his bat following a home run in the 5th inning Tuesday, almost as if he was saying “suck it,” and that angered the pinstriped crew.

Ortiz took a brushback pitch later in the game, and there were rumblings he would get hit by a pitch Wednesday to straighten things out. That never happened, but Ortiz learned his lesson after Yankees manager Joe Girardi said he didn’t really care for the bat flip. Even though the offense was minor, it still was classless and Girardi’s reaction was in line. Ortiz said the only reason Girardi didn’t like it is because it happened against his team. He’s right, but that doesn’t make the flip OK. Ortiz apparently learned his lesson.

On Wednesday, David took Yankees starter A.J. Burnett deep in the first inning but he circled the bases without incident. After the game he explained why he fell in line and decided not to flip the bat. Ortiz went off on a rant “I don’t want to be on national news tomorrow. I don’t want to have you guys asking me the same questions. I got almost 370 bombs in the big leagues and everybody wants to make a big deal because I bat flip one of them. [Expletive] that [expletive], man. If I have to make that video on my [expletive], let’s see how many bat flips I got on this [expletive]. Good night.”

That to me is an admission from Ortiz that his reaction was wrong. Nobody wants to be shown up, and Ortiz doesn’t want to pay the price in the form of being dosed by a pitch. He learned his lesson, and hopefully other players will take note. Are you listening, Bryce Harper?

Does Girardi Have it Out for the Red Sox?

Yankee fans should be proud of their skipper. While it could certainly be a coincidence, it’s starting to look like Joe Girardi is doing everything in his power to keep Red Sox players out of the 2010 MLB All-Star Game. Does the rivalry have anything to do with it? We’ll never know, but let’s speculate a little for fun.

During a Monday afternoon press conference, the American League All-Star manager announced that Rangers third baseman Michael Young would replace Red Sox third baseman Adrian Beltre on the AL roster. The only problem with that is Beltre — who tweaked his hamstring in a game against Toronto on Sunday — never said he wasn’t going to play. Players are allowed to wait until very close to the actual game to make a decision, which is probably what Beltre plans on doing. Even MLB spokesperson Phyllis Merhige couldn’t provide a clear answer as to how Girardi thought Beltre backed out:

Clearly it was a communication misunderstanding. Michael Young is the next guy on the player voting, so if Adrian Beltre can’t play it’s Michael Young. But Adrian had said all along he was going to make a decision about how he felt. I don’t know where Joe got it from. Maybe I miscommunicated it.”

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Girardi Cuts Out Yankees Sweet Tooth

After seeing what losing weight has done for A.J. Pierzynski’s turnaround season, Yankees manager Joe Girardi has decided to clamp down on his players’ eating habits. OK, maybe it wasn’t the AJ Pierzynski effect, but Girardi has nonetheless decided to eliminate sweets from the visiting clubhouses when the Yanks are on the road.

The Yankees contacted the visiting clubhouse manager of every stadium where they play and asked that the candy and ice cream be removed before the team comes to town.

The clubhouse in Tampa Bay replaced all the candy with nuts, dried fruit and granola. It was hilarious to watch as guys smuggled in candy bars and ate them furtively at their lockers.

I wondered myself why all this junk food was provided to these world-class athletes with finely tuned bodies. But then I realized we were talking about baseball players. Besides, some of them like to get sugar-rushes before the game — nothing wrong with that. Funny what losing or mediocrity does to someone’s mindset; I doubt sugary foods would have been a problem had the Yanks been 14-5 like Arizona.