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All Black Suit Giants All Business

That’s what you get when you leave Antonio Pierce in charge of the dresscode — players wearing all-black. So, as Tom Coughlin instructed Pierce to choose the wardrobe, New York arrived in Arizona looking like a bunch of secret service men. Pierce said black suits are what you wear for business — I guess he’s never been to a funeral. Perhaps his choice of garb is only underscoring the fact that the Giants will be buried on Sunday.

It’s nice to see that the Giants are attempting to be all about the business, assuming the role typically reserved for New England. Only problem is that you can’t out-Patriot the Patriots; they practically invented the team unity, humble pie, business-like approach to big games. Though this type of focus is right on for the Giants, unfortunately it’s coming at the wrong time. Doesn’t seem to be bothering Plaxico Burress however, as he’s predicting a 23-17 Giants win. Yeah, I’d like to see the Pats held to 17 points in warm weather. Now that would truly be deserving of a championship. But getting back to those black suits, it could be worse; you could’ve had Rex Grossman wearing purple — now that’s bad.

Where’s Tiki Barber Now?

Not long after the Giants had won the NFC title game, advancing to the Super Bowl, did the question pop into my head: Where’s Tiki Barber now? Ballhype reminded me of this thought and now I must ask it again. Where’s Tiki Barber now? I never really got into the whole Eli vs. Tiki bout that started earlier in the year, but I was quite disappointed with Tiki. His first move out of the field and into the broadcast chair and he’s ripping guys he played with no less than a year before? That was poor form. Poor form. He never needed to open up that can.

Alas, the Giants, Tom Coughlin and Eli Manning, are getting the last laugh. While Tiki talked a mess of ish how Coughlin ruined his enjoyment of the game, and how Eli wasn’t a leader, the Giants brushed it off and shoved it up Tiki’s ass. Barber retires and the Giants reach the Super Bowl. Where’s he now for his response? I’m not an Eli fan in the least bit, but I’d like to know what Tiki’s response is to what’s ensued. Karma is a bitch. Oh yeah, and love it or hate it Tiki, Eli Manning is in the Super Bowl. I hate it, and Tiki must be swallowing his words. Hard.

God Must Love Lawrence Tynes

Watching the finale to the Giants/Packers game, it became pretty clear to me that there was a life force guiding Lawrence Tynes yesterday. In a matter of minutes, Tynes went from having his life ruined — marred by missing the biggest kick(s) of his life — to booting the Giants to the Super Bowl. Tynes would have been hated. Crucified. Vilified. Mortified. He would have been done. Cast aside to join the likes of Scott Norwood in the history books. He would have been the man that cost the Giants a trip to the Super Bowl. Not once, but twice. Tynes the goat — could you imagine the headlines? He would have been done. Over. Ruined.

Alas, everything happens for a reason. The interception in overtime was Brett Favre’s gift to Tynes. Insurance that Lawrence wouldn’t go all Cole Ford on everyone later in life. Instead, he made the 47 yarder and sent the Giants to the Super Bowl. All was well. I don’t know about you, but that’s how I saw the game. I didn’t see it as a Brett Favre failure, nor as an Eli Manning triumph. What I saw was one lucky, extremely lucky man, who got his shot at redemption — a third time — and conquered. He changed his life with swing of his leg. From ruining the rest of his years, to being able to live and breathe without much thought. Incredible. Luckily for him the Super Bowl won’t come down to a field goal margin, otherwise he’d be toast.

Michael Strahan Digs Jessica Simpson

This whole Tony Romo/Chestica Simpson thing has gotten completely out of hand. First you had T.O. dogging Romo saying Simpson was a distraction. Then you had Tom Brady supposedly give Romo advice not to have his chick show up at games. Then with the Cowboys limping into the playoffs and sitting on a bye week ready to face the Giants, there was heavy speculation as to whether or not Simpson would show up at the playoff game. Things got so out of hand that you could bet on the likelihood of Chestica showing up at the game. Well, the million dollar question finally was answered, and none other than Michael Strahan was there to defend Romo:

“Heck, if Jessica Simpson wanted to date me, I may give her a shot,” said the recently divorced Strahan.

Strahan said he couldn’t blame Romo for the trip.

“If he wanted to sit in Dallas, they would have found some fault in that because he would have been with her if they had pictures of them in Dallas,” Strahan said. “So for them to go to Cabo or wherever they went, good for them. They deserve that time off.”

“I think anybody who thinks that because he took a few days with his girlfriend that he is going to come back and not play well or he is not going to be prepared if anything it probably stokes his fire to play even better.”

I completely agree with Strahan here. Jason Witten goes to Mexico, but it’s a tree in the forest. Tony Romo goes to Mexico, and all of a sudden the world is coming to an end. Please. And who’s to say Romo wasn’t out having his fun during the regular season and still tearing up the league? Seemed like his 36TDs and over 4,000 yards passing would suggest he can perform despite partying it up. And come on, like Strahan says, if Chestica wanted to date you, wouldn’t you give her a shot? Exactly. Must I remind you of this?

*Bonus poll, just for fun


Which space is larger?
Jessica Simpson’s cleavage
Michael Strahan’s gap
  
pollcode.com free polls

Get Off of Eli Manning’s Nuts

Just the same way many people hammered Eli for his crappy play in the past, those same folks have come full circle to jump on his nuts following the Giants win Sunday over the Bucs. See, that’s just the thing — many people called it Eli’s win, not the Giants’ win. Tom Coughlin didn’t get a win, Brandon Jacobs didn’t get a win, Michael Strahan didn’t get a win, nope. Only Eli Manning got a win. I heard Joe Buck say something to that effect during the broadcast — that Eli Manning, not the Giants, was beating Tampa Bay. I heard people say after the game that Eli got the monkey off his bank joining his brother in the second round of the playoffs. Sure, Eli had a good game, but was the victory solely his? I think not.

I can’t remember the last time a guy got as much credit as Eli has for doing as little as he’s done. He LOST to the Patriots but was made out to be a king for his performance. He didn’t even throw for 200 yards against the Bucs yet he’s now a bonafide playoff quarterback. For some reason or another, the Giants have now become the trendy sleeper pick to pull off an upset against the Cowboys. I’m not buying it. Eli can easily go back to throwing picks and turning the ball over, and Dallas is going to slam the Giants for the third time this year. Maybe then everyone will remember how much they used to hate on Eli because they all seem to have since forgotten.

Eli Manning Takes Five Steps Back

Eli Manning sadWell four to be exact, or three if you want to get specific. But seriously, is there anything more exhilarating than watching Eli Manning fail? I know it’s not nice to gloat over another’s shortcomings, but hey, sometimes you can’t help it (isn’t there even a German word for it, too?). And in the case of Eli, does anyone play the role of the loser better than him? He’s just like Worm rolling with Mikey. It’s great. And if you’re curious, a great deal of the hostility you’re detecting is the result of Eli’s cocky attitude upon being selected by San Diego — what a brat.

Getting back to business, just when Eli seemed to be moving forward in his career, he goes out and confuses the thousands in attendance who thought they were watching a Manning play QB, but wound up seeing worse than Tavarris Jackson. Yes, Eli was outplayed by Tavarris. Matter of fact, Eli’s three touchdown performance — for the Vikings — could have been the worst game played by a QB all year. Isn’t it games like that where you fake an injury just to spare embarrassment? How could you play so poorly at home? Now the Giants are 7-4 and heading right back into typical Coughlin second half season style. 9-7 here they come, led by Eli who continues to underwhelm.