Jennie Finch Won’t Be Getting Naked Anytime Too Soon

Jennie Finch is pretty busy these days pitching shutouts for Team USA in Beijing. Even though she’s been bringing the country lots of pride through her play on the field, it’s her looks off of it that brings the country all its joy. Unfortunately if you were hoping Finch were going to go the way of Ashley Harkleroad and Amanda Beard, it ain’t happening. In a recent interview, Jennie Finch was asked if she’d consider posing for Playboy. Despite giving elaborate answers on every other question, her response to that question was one word: no. That’s just too bad. Let’s see what we’re missing out on:

One of the other questions she gave a slightly more detailed answer, and that was in regards to her future career plans. She says she enjoys her commentary roles on ESPN and This Week in Baseball. She may enjoy her roles, but let’s just say it’s a good thing we don’t have to hear her continue to make mistakes as a fantasy baseball analyst. But if she is willing to reconsider her position on the whole posing naked thing, I’m all for it.

Amanda Beard Posing Nude for PETA in Protest of Fashion Furs at Beijing

Everyone’s favorite Olympian, Amanda Beard, who already showed off her goods in a sexy spread for Playboy magazine, is at it again. And by at it, I mean set to appear nude and bare her fine body for the masses. Beard’s teaming with PETA in an anti-fur for fashion campaign that will feature her posing nude in front of the water cube swimming venue in Beijing:

“Seeing animals slaughtered to be worn as fashion is awful to me, so I’m definitely against wearing fur … I’d much rather go naked than ever put a dead animal on my body,” PETA quoted Beard as saying.

One can only hope that Beard looks as sexy in those pictures as she does in some of these ones. And as wacky and crazy PETA can get sometimes, as long as they’re making it up to us by getting Amanda Beard to pose nude, I’m on board with it. Heck, she might just have been the best looking Olympian to pose in Playboy.

Ashley Harkleroad Posing in Playboy

I bet when the P.R. reps over at Playboy were discussing the matter of how they would handle the announcement that Harkleroad was going to appear in the August issue of the magazine, they were thinking that releasing the news the day before the French Open — one of tennis’ majors — would be the perfect time. Might as well go on the attack while tennis is fresh in everyone’s mind and while ESPN is pushing their coverage of it. I’ll bet in their meetings they never really considered how this would go over if their star made a dubious first-round exit in the grand slam event. Of course, that’s usually how things work out, isn’t it?

So yeah, Harkleroad lost badly to Serena Williams in the first round of the French, and really hasn’t made much of a name for herself as a tennis player. She’s currently ranked around 61st in the world right now — nowhere near even what Kournikova was. And you know what, when it comes to all the possibilities we could have had from female tennis players posing in Playboy, I’ll go with the Bob Uecker, “Frankly, I think we got hosed on that one.” Like Harkleroad’s OK I guess, but she wouldn’t have me running to the newsstand. And she’s not even that good at her sport. I’m kinda scratching my head on this one. And not to mention, think about all the different places Playboy’s efforts could be better focused.

Soccer Streaker Posing for Playboy

It doesn’t take a whole lot these days to become famous. (or at least get your 15 minutes). If you’re a chick, it pretty much consists of showing up at a televised sporting event wearing very little clothing. Or if you just want to completely strip away the power of imagination, you could just decide to go streaking on the field. That’s what Tiffany May decided to do at a U.S. vs. Honduras soccer match not long ago. And what has that done for her? Landed her a shoot in playboy.

Not exactly something that would send me running to the store, but not bad. I’d say the soccer referee who posed in Playboy was more enticing. But man, life’s just made if you’re a chick these days.