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Apparently All Black Coaches Look the Same to This Photographer

While surfing through Getty Images’ photos from the Seahawks/Bears game to use for my Jim Mora/Olindo Mare story, I came across a picture I didn’t recognize. I clicked on the thumbnail to see what I was missing. At that point I realized I wasn’t the one who was missing something — it was Getty’s photographer, Otto Greule Jr., who got his black coaches mixed up. Check out this photo and then read the caption:

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SEATTLE – SEPTEMBER 27: Head coach Lovie Smith of the Chicago Bears looks on during the game against the Seattle Seahawks on September 27, 2009 at Qwest Field in Seattle, Washington. The Bears defeated the Seahawks 25-19. (Photo by Otto Greule Jr/Getty Images)

It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that the person pictured above is not Lovie Smith. The picture actually appears to be one of Chicago’s running back coach, Tim Spencer. Naaaa, all black coaches look the same, what’s the difference, right?

The Packers Didn’t Draft B.J. Raji for His Command of the English Language

Yes, that’s how Packers first-round pick and former Boston College Eagles DT B.J. Raji signed an autograph as pointed out by the folks at Deadspin. Let’s just hope this guy stuffs the run and sacks quarterbacks better than he spells. Maybe he should have put down the bong and actually attended a few English classes. Perhaps that would have helped. For the record, I’m expecting him to be a bust — I just get a horrible sense about his body language.

(Or maybe he was just trying to share with us how all the players felt after games??)

Tim Tebow Won FOX’s Heisman Trophy

We went over a similar issue when the Giants won the Super Bowl. When there’s a big announcement/outcome expected in the sports world and there’s a pre-determined amount of possibilities for how things will turn out, media members will often try to get a jump start on announcing the result first by pre-producing stories for each side. For instance, Reebok had two versions for the Perfectville commercial depending on who won the Super Bowl. When the Giants won, they aired one version and just discarded the other. That means all media outlets had all week to prepare articles and reports for each of the three possible Heisman Trophy winners. Foxsports.com apparently was quite diligent in doing their preparation. Only one problem. As Deadspin points out, they published the wrong winner on their site:

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Danyelle Sargent Probably Would Like This One Back

I first heard about this ever-so-awkward interview between FOX reporter Danyelle Sargent and 49ers head coach Mike Singletary on Monday. Unfortunately by the time I had a chance to take a peek, it had already been pulled down from YouTube. The video was posted a second time and then taken down because of copyright violation. Alas, we have found yet another version (crossing fingers it doesn’t get taken down) … here’s the infamous Danyelle Sargent/Mike Singletary video in which Sargent asks what advice the deceased since 2007 Bill Walsh gave him before the game (transcribed below in case the video doesn’t work):

Here’s how the video went in case it’s gone when you go to check it out, coupled with Sargent’s explanation for the screw up:

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LA Times Is Up-to-Date on its Hockey

LBS reader Andy happened upon the front page of the LA Times online the other day and noticed a nice feature story on Rob Blake getting some prominent play on the site. We’re talking about the front page of the entire site mind you, not just the sports section. And that’s in a town with fan favorites like the Lakers and Dodgers. Needless to say, it was a big step for the NHL to get that type of pub. Only problem, the web editor creating the captions isn’t exactly Mr. Current Affairs when it comes to the NHL. Check it out:

Correct me if I’m wrong, but Rob Blake did sign with the San Jose Sharks a few weeks ago, no? Heck, didn’t the LA Times even have the story a few weeks ago? That’s what I thought. You know, I much prefer when web editors just stick to dirty titles instead.

Ian Kennedy ‘Jerked Off’ Before Start

Yes, it’s true. At least according to YES Network broadcaster, David Cone:

I have heard of relievers banging chicks from the stands in the clubhouse while the game was going on, and I’ve heard of relievers jerking themselves off while games were going on (also in the clubhouse), but I’ve never heard of a pitcher getting jerked off in the bullpen before a start. Maybe that explains why Don Zimmer was kept on staff so many years. Pretty good one by Coney, not quite as good as the goalie who made a “dick save,” but pretty good.

Major chest bump to Josh Alper at FanHouse for the vid.

Vesa Toskala’s Third Leg Stops Five Hole

Ohhh boy. Sometimes these headlines just write themselves. I was absolutely busting up like you couldn’t believe after seeing this video. It will only take about 10 seconds of your time, and make sure you have the volume down slightly if you’re at work — the language is mildly NSFW. Enjoy the enjoyment:

Maybe it’s the imagery of the whole event that gets me laughing. I dunno. I have the sense of humor of a 3rd grader, what can I say.

Video courtesy of Awful Announcing, like usual. I just hope I never make it on there for the wrong reasons, unlike some of the guys below.