Larry Brown Sports

Chad Ochocinco — who probably salivates at the thought of a good end zone dance more than he does at the thought of a Super Bowl ring — has already announced his plans for his first touchdown celebration.  After seeing the Batman and Robin photoshoot, I expected his first end zone dance to have something to do with his new partner.  Turns out it’s a lot more complicated than that.  Relax, it doesn’t have anything to do with “Russell the love muscle” either.  No. 85 plans on firing one of the Patriots muskets if he finds pay dirt.

First of all, I don’t see how he could pull that off.  Those rifles can’t be that easy to fire, can they?  And would one of the guys who works at the Pats games and does the firing just hand him their gun?  I highly doubt it.

Second order of business: I’ll be at this game in Foxboro.  As a Patriots fan, I must admit I’m going to be a little torn.  I never want to see the home team give up a score, but I’m anxious to see Ochocinco’s approach.  Needless to say if the Pats jump out to a big lead, I’ll be secretly rooting for an Ochocinco score.

Source:
Ochocinco on Twitter

Originally I would have thought there was only one way a golfer could start a forest fire, but I now realize there are two: dropping a lit stogie and smacking your club on a rock while hitting a shot from dry grass.  No, seriously.

Sports by Brooks informs us that it took 200 firefighters over seven hours to contain a 12-acre forest fire at Shady Canyon Golf Course in Irvine, California on Saturday afternoon.  Here’s what the Orange County Register reported about the blaze.

[Orange County Fire Authority Captain Greg] McKeown said the fire likely was sparked when a golfer – who knocked his golf ball into the grass that borders the fairway – struck a rock with his club trying to get the ball out of the rough.

I bet the golfer that hit the shot has never regretted missing the fairway more in his life if that is indeed what started the massive fire.  On a side note, Shady Canyon is supposedly the preferred golf course of Tiger Woods when he’s staying at home in California.  Then again, it’s awfully tough to gauge where exactly home is for Tiger these days.

Sources:
Golf Shot Sparks Blaze, 200 Firefighters Respond [SPORTS by BROOKS]
Fires in Shady Canyon contained [Orange County Register]

Although he did little outside of breaking the hearts of Bears fans last season as their starting quarterback, it appears Jay Cutler may have something to brag about.  If Perez Hilton’s sources are well-informed and Jay Cutler is dating Kristin Cavallari, she’s just been transformed into one of Steve’s smokin’ hot sports girlfriends.

We can only assume Cavallari is not much of a football fan, and certainly not a Chicago Bears fan.  Otherwise, there really would be nothing to like after last season’s performance.  Who knows, maybe he’ll turn it around in his second season.  He’s still not worth $100 million, but I have no other choice than to give him a pat on the back if these rumors hold true.

Source:
Kristin Cavallari and Jay Cutler May Be Dating zOMFG! [The Big Lead via Perez Hilton]

Do I care that Marcus Jordan spent $35,000 at the Haze at Aria Resort and Casino in Las Vegas?  No.  Do I care that he’s only 19 years old and was more than likely poppin’ bottles?  No.  If that’s your idea of fun, then go for it.  Just don’t Tweet about it and make it everyone’s problem, forcing Nevada regulators to probe MGM resorts.

If Marcus wants to carry on the family tradition of having a serious gambling problem, that’s certainly his prerogative.  I’m even a fan of the girl he’s shown with in the pictures below, even if it is indeed his ex-girlfriend.  The Marcus Jordan Las Vegas pictures probably would have leaked to the public either way (see James, Lebron), but he needs to learn how to make it more of a challenge for us bloggers to get a hold of them.  Live and learn, young Airness.

Photo Credit: Deadspin

This may be the first time we’ve had a Minor League Baseball story here at LBS that didn’t involve a wacky manager having a meltdown. That’s also because it’s not too often we come across a game where a player drives in 11 runs in a single game (although we did see a 10 RBI game not too long ago).

What most people consider to be excellent production for a week of work, Mike Moustakas accomplished in one game. As LBS contributor Alan Hull alerted us, the Omaha infielder went 4-for-6 on Monday night with three home runs and 11 RBIs. Moustakas homered twice in the third (once off former Nats reliever Gary Majewski), and he also went deep off Jennie Finch’s husband, Casey Daigle for a three-run shot in the 7th. Moustakas even threw in a bases-clearing three-run double for extra giggles.

As good as Moustakas was Monday, he hadn’t flashed the promise the Royals saw when they made him the second pick of the 2007 draft the last few years in the minors. After two decent years, Mike has completely put it together to become the Texas League Player of the Year, and this 11 RBI game further cements how much he’s in his groove. Kansas City may choose to bring him along slowly, but there’s no doubt that this 11 RBI game has clearly put Moustakas’ name on the map.

If it feels like we’ve been here before, it’s because we have. Roger Federer went between his legs last year at the U.S. Open in the semifinals against Novak Djokovic and hit a beautiful cross court winner. Fed ultimately lost in the finals to Juan Martin del Potro, but he won’t have to worry about the same fate this year (del Potro is out with an injury). Maybe Monday’s first-round match indicates Federer will be on track to repeat last year’s success. At the least, the guy sure knows how to give the fans top quality entertainment. Check out this Roger Federer between the legs shot video from Monday against Brian Dabul:

Now that it’s been confirmed Federer has his trick shot arsenal fully loaded, his true obstacle will be overcoming Robin Soderling who ended up in his quarter of the draw. Soderling beat Federer at the French Open to end Roger’s incredible consecutive Grand Slam semifinal appearance streak. On hard courts, it will be a different story.

Video Credit: YouTube user BATennistv

I must say, there’s nobody that can leave a town quite like Manny Ramirez.  As his days were dwindling down with the Boston Red Sox, Manny made a habit of pretending he was injured in order to stick it to the team and be taken out of the lineup.  That’s probably one of the main reasons Jonathan Papelbon called him a clubhouse cancer.  No. 24 forced his way out of Boston and embarked on a new journey as No. 99 in L.A., where “Mannywood” became an immediate hit.

After being placed on waivers and claimed by the Chicago White Sox, Ramirez has officially worn out his welcome in another big city.  Once again, he managed to shorten his stay, this time by getting himself ejected after the first pitch of a sixth-inning at-bat in Colorado Sunday afternoon.  Here’s the video of Manny Ramirez getting ejected in his last Dodgers at-bat, courtesy of You Been Blinded:

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Steelers safety Troy Polamalu is one of the biggest paradoxes in the NFL; he’s one of the most ferocious defensive backs in the game and makes incredible plays, yet he has the longest hair and one of the softest voices in the league. It just doesn’t jive.

Polamalu’s popularity as a player precedes him as he was actually featured on the cover of Madden 2010 last year. The Madden Cover Curse struck Troy in the first half of his season opener last year as he hurt his knee and hardly contributed to Pittsburgh’s defense, playing just five games. This was bad news for more than just Steelers fans; head and shoulders made a big investment in Troy, featuring him in commercials all throughout the season. After making such a large commitment to a player, the last thing you want to see is him get injured and become irrelevant.

Well, it looks like head and shoulders is sticking by their guy. It was announced Monday that the P&G shampoo company took out a $1 million insurance policy on Troy Polamalu’s hair with Lloyd’s of London. Apparently Polamalu hasn’t cut his locks for seven years which is about 83 months more than me. His hair has become so long it seems to be a hazard on the field, but at least the good news is he doesn’t play offense otherwise people could use it as a tackling device.

By the way, I fully realize that I’ve taken the bait in a total publicity stunt, but it was a good one. Plus, you really think I would miss a chance to post pictures of Polamalu going with the Nordberg ‘do?