David Ortiz’s Positive Test Was Also Caused by Flintstones Chewable Vitamins

I was holding out some hope that David Ortiz might actually be forthright and honest when he decided to finally address his positive steroids test from 2003 but I was wrong. Judging by the way he was acting, why wouldn’t I have hoped for the best? He told us that he’s always upfront and honest with the media and that he would continue to act that way as soon as he gathered some more information about the positive test. He said he would tell the truth and that’s what I expected. Although he found out on Thursday the 31st of July that he was on the list for a positive test, it somehow took him over a week to “gather all the facts.”

If Ortiz weren’t trying to come up with the best possible defense to deflect all blame and portray himself in the best possible light then he would have just spoke the next day and given us the honest truth. Instead, he took the scummy way out and sat behind the protection of the even more dishonest player’s union. He never explained what he took, when he took it, or why. Instead, he gave us some totally bullcrap answer saying that he’s never used or bought steroids and that the positive test was caused by vitamins or supplements. Riiiiight.

Thing is, I wouldn’t be nearly as upset about Ortiz achieving what he did because of performance-enhancers (if most of the league was on them, then it was pretty much an even playing field), if he had just told the truth. It’s the lying that bugs me and not just that, the pathetic lie that irks me. What does he take us for, 8-year-olds who also believe in Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy? Does he really think we’re that dumb that we’re just supposed to believe some Flintstones chewables caused the positive test? Is there a sign on my head saying “idiot?” Like Ortiz went from being a platoon guy with the Twins to being a 54-home run hitter just by “changing his approach at the plate.” Any coincidence he’s back to a mediocre player now that there’s penalties for positive tests.

As if Ortiz flat-out lying to us behind the shield of the Union wasn’t enough, especially when Ortiz told us he would be honest and not hide anything, the Union’s actions are even more disgusting. Their latest strategy is to try and make you believe that the ’03 test list is inaccurate and that the lab that did the testing isn’t credible — all because the results aren’t convenient for them. Next thing you know they’ll be telling us that Dinosaurs never existed because they never witnessed them. Give me a break.

I’m not at all surprised by the Union’s actions, but I’m surprised David Ortiz had to hide behind them when he seemed to be such an outgoing guy who, in his words, never hid and always was upfront. I hope the lying eats at his conscience and that he one day decides to apologize and tell the truth. That’s assuming any of these guys actually have consciences left.