Juan Uribe says they don’t make cups big enough for his junk

Cleveland Indians third baseman Juan Uribe sat out Monday’s game with a testicular contusion. He suffered the injury during a win over the Los Angeles Angels on Sunday when a Mike Trout grounder took a bad hop and caught him between the legs.

Had Uribe been wearing a cup, it would have hurt a lot less. But when you’re as blessed as he is, sometimes that just isn’t an option.

Juan Uribe (testicular contusion) said no BP today. Asked why he doesn't use a cup, he said: "I don't think the trainers have my size." Oh.

— Jordan Bastian (@MLBastian) June 13, 2016

Uribe was dead serious when he made the comment. And if you believe what KFC from Barstool Sports heard about Uribe from multiple people last year, you know the 37-year-old probably isn’t lying.

A baseball to the nuts hurts whether you’re wearing a cup or not — just ask this guy. When you’ve got as much going on down there as Uribe supposedly has, it’s going to hurt a lot worse.

Photo: Jayne Kamin-Oncea-USA TODAY Sports