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Seth Meyers Makes Fun of Broke Dodgers During ESPYs Monologue

It’s official: the Los Angeles Dodgers are a national punchline. ESPYs host Seth Meyers spent a good chunk of his opening monologue ripping on the storied franchise for their financial troubles. Meyers mentioned All-Star outfielder Matt Kemp and that was his segue into the Dodgers’ issue. That’s when the fun started …

“By the way, I should point out that the proceeds to tonight’s show go to a very worthy charity … the Los Angeles Dodgers of America,” Meyers joked.

“Dodger outfielder Matt Kemp is here tonight. Frank McCourt told Matt Kemp ‘Have fun tonight’ and then added ‘If they have ketchup packets grab as many as you can. Because we have run out of ketchup. Dodger Stadium no longer has ketchup.’”

“The Dodgers are so broke when players steal bases, Frank McCourt asks that the players please return them. The Dodgers are so broke their third base coach is just a mirror reflecting the image of their first base coach. The Dodgers are so broke three of their players tested positive for Ramen noodles.”

All of the jokes were money, and Frank McCourt quite frankly deserves the ridicule. He’s been a horrible owner and MLB can’t seize the team soon enough in the eyes of many fans. I hope he’s made aware of the jokes so he understands what he’s done to the franchise. He no longer deserves to own the team.

Seth Meyers Goes Long on Greg Oden’s Schlong

Seth Meyers nailed it as the host of the 2010 ESPY’s. His opening monologue started off slowly but really picked up steam as he went along. The instant reaction from most twitter users was that Meyers killed it as host. Although he had some great lines such as his one about the Kardashian sisters, there was one that didn’t go over quite as well, probably because most people didn’t get it. The joke was about Greg Oden’s penis, which spread across the internet after some girl turned Oden in for sexting. Meyers mentioned the joke in the context of the John Isner/Nicolas Mahut 11-hour tennis match:

That match was so long that the ballboys became ballmen. That match was so long Greg Oden took a picture of it and sent it to his girlfriend … You may not care for that joke but all the proceeds from it went to the Boys and Girls Club of America. That match was so long that the only guys who ever spent more time on grass together were Cheech and Chong.

Meyers picked things back up after hearing crickets initially, getting in a shot at LeBron whose “Decision” show was billed as helping charity. One has to wonder if Meyers’ Oden penis joke would have made it onto TV had the show been edited like usual. Even if that’s the risk of airing the show live, I hope ESPN continues to air the ESPY’s live on Wednesday rather than on tape Sunday; it gives us sports fans something fun to look forward to during the All-Star break.

Seth Meyers Hosts the ESPYs … Really

So ESPN selected Seth Meyers to host the ESPY Awards 2010 … really. Because so many athletes don’t have games on Saturday nights nor are they out partying so they must all be familiar with Meyers … really. As a sports fan, you probably are wondering to yourself who this Seth Meyers guy is. Well, he’s a dude who’s from New Hampshire and apparently is a big Red Sox Fan. If you’re like me and unfamiliar with Meyers, he hosts the weekend update on Saturday Night Live along with Amy Poehler. He’s got some funny jokes and a pretty good delivery, but his job was made even more difficult because he had to host the show while it was live instead of tape delayed.

Meyers actually killed the monologue, getting more and more laughs as he went on. Meyers started off somewhat slowly, going after Shaun White whose coach was caught cussing on TV during the Olympics. After his start with White, Meyers rotated into the comfort zone of Brett Favre old jokes. The Favre jokes were pretty ordinary and you could tell that Deanna didn’t find them very funny. Luckily Meyers moved onto Tim Tebow to ease the tension. After a jersey-selling, Jesus joke, Meyers started to get his groove.

ESPN televising the LeBron decision became a hot topic which later was spoofed by Steve Carell and Paul Rudd. The LeBron decision was an easy target, but Meyers’ jokes weren’t anything special, and they resulted in some unamused faces from ESPN personalities Erin Andrews and Stuart Scott. When Meyers transitioned to the Lakers and eventually the World Cup, he started tearing it up. Meyers had an outstanding bit about Pau Gasol’s European look, cracking on Pau’s neck beard (not his man-purse), saying that we didn’t need any more reminders that Gasol was a Euro. It was towards the end of the Lakers bit that Meyers threw in what might have been his best line of the night, saying that the ESPYs are where sports and entertainment come together … like a Kardashian sister’s bedroom. That joke may have drawn the loudest roars from the crowd and was hilarious.

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