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#pounditSunday, October 2, 2022

PETA sends Warren Sapp vegan lobster following shark bite


PETA has decided to use Warren Sapp’s misfortune as an opportunity to capitalize on some publicity.

After hearing that the Pro Football Hall of Famer suffered a shark bite while lobstering in the Florida Keys, the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals sent a letter and gift to the former defensive lineman.

Here’s the letter, which was rife with football puns.

Dear Warren,

We heard about your interception of a defensive shark’s lobster dinner, so we wanted to pass along some delicious cruelty-free vegan lobster in the hope that it’s a winner with you and yours. We don’t want you running back to the water until you’ve tasted it—sharks work as a team to obtain food, so unwanted competition may be awaiting you. Despite that nasty bite, it’s humans who rank as the deadliest predator of all. We hope you look after yourself, so we invite you to tackle any health problems with vegan foods and to be a champion of lobsters. All your fans at PETA are wishing you a speedy recovery.

Warm regards,

Andrew Bernstein and the PETA Team

As mentioned in the get well note, the organization is sending Sapp a vegan lobster to try.

Sapp should be appreciative, because he sure could use the TLC. After all, that bite from the shark was pretty nasty as the photo showed.


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