No, that story is not a joke. You figure some fans are willing to go pretty far to get tickets to a big game — an Arizona Cardinals fan got his butt tattooed for NFC Championship Game tickets — but Susan Finklestein has taken the game to a whole new level. She apparently was so desperate for Phillies World Series tickets that she posted an ad on craigslist that hinted at sexual offers.

According to police, her online ad read: “DESPERATE BLONDE NEEDS WS TIX (Philadelphia) Diehard Phillies fan–gorgeous tall buxom blonde– in desperate need of two World Series Tickets. Price negotiable— I’m the creative type! Maybe we can help each other!”

Bensalem Township police said they made contact with the female after viewing her add on Craigslist.com. The woman then allegedly solicited an undercover police officer to perform various sex acts in exchange for the tickets.

Man, there are some horny guys out there, I’m surprised this didn’t work out. By the way, one of the advantages of being a police officer is you can get the sex first and then make the arrest second. So now we know what being a “creative type” means. Nice going, Susan. At least she’ll get to watch the series before her case goes to trial.

Let’s see, the Browns lost 23-20 in overtime to drop to 0-4 and Braylon Edwards was catchless, putting up a freaking goose egg in the game. Whatever production he lacked against the Bengals he apparently tried to make up for after the game. Edwards has been accused of punching a club promoter in the face, giving him a cut and black eye and sending the guy to the hospital. The club promoter gave his side of the story:

After the club closed, I was outside greeting and saying goodbye to people. Braylon comes up and started saying things, degrading me. He said if it wasn’t for LeBron or the Four Horsemen, I wouldn’t have what I have, nor would I be able to get girls. Everyone knows Braylon has a problem with LeBron. So I had to speak up for myself. The conversation started to escalate. As some of his teammates started to pull him back, he punched me. I have a black eye and a cut. I’m not a violent guy. As long as I’ve known Braylon, I’ve allowed him and his friends to come into our events free of charge. Whatever jealousy he has with LeBron, he felt he needed to take it out on me.”

I’m sure this guy wasn’t as innocent as he’s coming off in the story but I can buy everything he’s saying about Braylon. If your team was 0-4 in a city where all the fans are hardcore, and you feel embarrassed for not having any catches, I could see where you’d be trying to put others down to pump yourself up. Think about it — this is the same Braylon Edwards who shows off how much alcohol he has stocked at his house. He’s not exactly the smartest cat out there.

First off, let’s make this clear: nobody deserves to get robbed. Secondly, what kind of jerkoffs wait for a moment when they know a guy’s going to be gone playing in a game to rob him? How weak is that? Well I guess that’s exactly how they all do it, but anyway, it’s pretty hard to lose almost half a million dollars worth of jewelry if you never own $400,000 worth of jewelry in the first place. Maybe Bills DB Donte Whitner, who was robbed of that amount while he was away at his game Sunday, has learned his lesson the hard way.

You just have to hope the guys who robbed him aren’t fans considering Whitner had a pick six at the beginning of the game to help Buffalo build a big lead. I’m actually quite pleased about that because Buffalo’s big lead early forced Tampa to throw the rest of the game to try and come back. Since I have Kellen Winslow as my tight end in the Yardbarker Coors Light fantasy football league, all the throwing helped K2 rack up stats and it led me to a big win. The ironic aspect to this story is that there was an article floating around last week about NFL players having financial problems following retirement. Gee, when you’re wasting $400,000 on jewelry, it’s easy to see why. Hey Donte, ever try a savings account?

Let’s get this one straight: I care as much about Tila Tequila as Sheriff Department spokesman Jan Caldwell who called the accusing party, “Tina Nguyen.” And if you’re Shawne Merriman, fooling around with a girl best known for starring in a bisexual reality TV show will not earn you sympathy when you get involved in drama — you’ve asked for it. The only question regarding the arrest of Merriman for allegedly choking Tequila is: who is telling the truth? For the answer, let’s go to the tail of the tape:

I’d have to say the clear advantage goes to Merriman. Heck, you go by the way he said it (in his lawyer’s words, of course), and you’d think the guy was a regular American hero! He better hope he’s not facing any punishment from Roger Goodell because returning from knee surgery should already be tough enough. Again, who messes with dumbasses like Tina Tequila anyway unless they’re looking for attention/publicity, be it good or bad?

So, you ever wonder what many of these chicks did before they scored themselves a baller-man? Many of them were Hooters waitresses, strippers, models, or pretty much anything else that associates making money off a hot body. Thing is rarely do any of them go back to that stuff once they hit the gold mine. Apparently that’s not the case for former Red Sox OF Troy O’Leary’s ex-wife, Annette Gray O’Leary aka Taya Taylor. The Arizona Republic via Sports by Brooks tells us that O’Leary/Taylor has a night job as a hooker in addition to her day job as an assistant principal at an elementary school.

According to this page that has been recently taken down, O’Leary/Taylor charges some big bucks for her “services.” Her rates are likely comparable to what her husband made by hitting singles, doubles, triples, and home runs. Check out the hooker fees:

600 1HR
1000 2 HR
1500 3 HR
3000 Overnight (10 hours)

At least you don’t have to pay extra while she’s asleep. So with this story coming out, you think it’s the result of some bitter parent who’s kid didn’t get the grades they wanted? That’s where my money is … it certainly isn’t on two hours of fun with ms. taylor.

You might be asking yourself why this story sounds so familiar. The answer is pretty simple: at last check, former Titans and Broncos running back Travis Henry had nine kids by nine different women. If you thought that was impressive then hold onto your mouse and keyboard for something even better than that:

Vanessa Colbert recently became the second woman in Orange County to try to collect child support from Henry. She says the former athlete fathered her twins, who are now 18 months old.
…
Henry, who recently pleaded guilty to a federal drug charge, isn’t current with any of his child-support payments, which are estimated to total $15,000 a month.

Did Colbert do any of her research before engaging in intercourse? If so, she may have realized that Henry had dropped down the Broncos’ depth chart and she might have passed on the sex. I mean the least you could is punch him up in google news to see if he’s worth banging, right? You would think that’s the least a diligent groupie could do.

(via Deadspin)

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