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#pounditSaturday, August 8, 2020

Darwin Nominees

Lehigh Football players arrested after breaking into wrong house, beating up wrong person


Six members of the Lehigh University football team were charged on Wednesday with felony criminal trespass after they allegedly broke into an off-campus house as payback for an alleged attack on a fraternity president.

The Morning Call reports that police had previously charged another football player, 20-year old Brian Githens, with burglary, simple assault and criminal mischief stemming from the same incident.

And get this — the players supposedly went to the wrong house.

According to court documents, several players stormed into the house where Lehigh students Samuel Hernandez and Collin Davis live on Nov. 8 and kicked in the doors to their bedrooms. Hernandez claims he was punched several times in the face, leaving him with a concussion and a “busted lip.” Another one of the men who was charged Wednesday, 20-year-old Dylan Parsons, allegedly urinated in the victims’ refrigerator.

Githens told police that he broke into the home in retribution for an assault on his fraternity president, but he admitted the players broke into the wrong home and attacked the wrong person.

We have seen college football players get into trouble with the law for some incredibly dumb things (here’s a great example), but this is up there with some of the most idiotic. Risking your status as a student athlete to get back at someone is idiotic enough, let alone not even staking out the right house.

H/T Deadspin

Man gets stuck in basketball hoop, has to be freed by firefighters (Video)

It’s been a while since we’ve used the Darwin Nominees category here at LBS, but this story definitely was reason for us to break it out again.

Some shirtless dunderhead in Seattle climbed onto a basketball hoop at Cal Anderson Park and somehow got stuck. He was carrying a hammer and kept waving it at people and police officers, making the whole spectacle even more bizarre.

The fire department had to be called to come help, and they set up a ladder to help bring the guy down. The guy looked like an angry animal at the zoo the way he was resisting all assistance offers. I’m sure him being half-naked with his bare bum hanging out didn’t make the thought of helping any more enticing.

Below is the full video via WTSP:


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Zamboni driver’s blood-alcohol level was nearly four times legal limit


A Zamboni driver at a high school hockey game in North Dakota was arrested on Friday night when it was discovered that he was heavily intoxicated.

According to the Grand Folks Herald, 27-year-old Steven James Anderson had a blood-alcohol level of 0.30, which is nearly four times the legal limit of 0.08. He was arrested during intermission of the Davies and Williston girls’ game at South Sports Arena in Fargo after spectators noticed he was swerving all over the place while cleaning the ice.

You can’t make this stuff up.

Anderson was fired on Monday and the Fargo Park District has decided to make sure two staff members are always on duty during high school games going forward. There was no reserve Zamboni driver available to clean the ice after Anderson was relieved of his duties on Friday.

Anderson had worked for the Fargo Park District for six years and had reportedly never been an issue. He is facing a misdemeanor count of driving while under the influence. In December, he pleaded guilty to driving while under the influence and possession of marijuana paraphernalia.

Believe it or not, this is not the first time a Zamboni driver has been caught drunk on the job. You can read similar stories here and here.

Red Sox prospect Jon Denney told police he was ‘looking for pussy’ during arrest

Jon Denney Red Sox

Boston Red Sox catching prospect Jon Denney was arrested for the second time in three months, but this one takes the cake by far.

According to a police report obtained by Yahoo! Sports’ Jeff Passan, Denney was pulled over just before midnight Wednesday night after cops observed his truck fishtailing. Denney gave the police a license that restricted him to driving for business and emergencies because of a previous DUI.

When asked why he was in the Fort Meyers Beach area, Denney gave police the moneyshot.

“Partying and looking to get some pussy.”

But the story doesn’t end there!

Denney called a friend to pick him up, but police saw him drive out of a parking lot two hours later. He supposedly was belligerent and began to cuss after being pulled over, and then went on one of those infamous “don’t you know who I am?” rants.

Passan, citing the police report, says Denney told the cops “he was a Boston Red Sox player and he didn’t care [sic] he had money and made more money than we would ever see.” When handcuffed, the report said, Denney said “he would be out in no time because of who he played for and that he made three million a year.”

Denney was booked and released on Thursday.

Unreal. What a tool.

This clown was drafted in the third round (81st overall) last year out of Yukon High School in Oklahoma. In 26 games in rookie ball last season, the chump hit .202/.379/.243. And I thought the Sox actually did background research before drafting prospects …

Forearm bash to Deadspin

Mike Williams had stripper pole in living room of party house

Mike Williams BucsIf there’s such a thing as the “Andrew Bynum of the NFL,” Tampa Bay Buccaneers wide receiver Mike Williams would have to be close to earning the title.

Williams caught a franchise-record 11 touchdowns in his rookie season in 2010 and was signed to a six-year, $40.25 million contract extension before last season that included $15 million guaranteed. He missed most of last season with a hamstring injury, and now we’re learning about some of the off-field issues he’s had.

According to a lengthy report from the Tampa Bay Times, Williams is in legal and financial trouble over his mistreatment of a home he was renting in a gated community. Williams turned the home into a massive party spot, much to the anger of his neighbors.

Two weeks ago it was reported that Williams was due in court for Dec. charges of criminal mischief and trespassing. The latest report says the charges were related to Williams being evicted from the home he rented for nearly two years.

According to The Times, Williams set the tone for his party home by throwing a massive rager a few weeks after moving in in late 2012. The first party took place two days before the Bucs lost to the Dallas Cowboys on the road. The pattern of partying continued throughout his time there.

Among some of the gems from the report:

– There were five 911 calls to the home from June-September

– A neighbor says Williams had a stripper pole in the living room that was visible when the front door was open

– Stretch limos pulled up at 4:00 a.m. to drop people off for parties

– The parties were so big cars parked on the grass and mattresses were left on the lawn

Doesn’t sound too dissimilar from what Bynum’s neighbors complained about, right?

Keep in mind that Williams was living in a gated community called the “Sanctuary.”

Williams reportedly paid the home owner $50,000 in a settlement to repair damages to the home or items missing altogether. He did not vacate the home after his lease expired in August and only signed an agreement after being faced with threats of eviction. The agreement called for him to surrender his security deposit of $3,600, extend his lease for one month at $6,000 and pay $43,000 in damages and attorneys fees.

The home owner filed a suit against Williams in Dec. after the wide receiver failed to pay those amounts, but it looks like things have been resolved since.

Williams was called the “absolute worst neighbor” one could imagine by someone who said they despised the wide receiver. New Bucs coach Lovie Smith also came down hard on Williams in comments to The Times that indicated the receiver is not living up to expected standards off the field.

Williams will probably be kept by the Bucs next season because of how much money he is owed, but he does not seem like he’s going to last there long.

Williams was drafted in the fourth round by the Bucs in 2010 and dropped because of all the problems he had in college. He was dismissed by Syracuse in 2008 for academic issues, then quit in 2009 when he was faced with a possible suspension. He also had a DUI arrest in his rookie season.

Dumbest woman ever mouths off to judge, gets 300 days in jail (Video)

Ebony BurksThis video is actually from last summer, but I saw it for the first time this week and thought it was too awesome not to share here.

According to The Chronicle-Telegram’s story from August, the woman in the video is 32-year-old Ebony Burks, and she was being arraigned on domestic violence charges. Burks was appearing via video from Lorain County Jail and actually was pretty composed when she pleaded not guilty. But things took a turn for the worst when she realized that terms of the restraining order imposed by Elyria Municipal Court Judge Gary Bennett included her avoiding all contact with the two alleged victims, meaning she couldn’t go to the home she shared with her grandfather.

As soon as Burks puts it together that she can’t go home, the fireworks begin. I mean she just brings out the A+ attitude. She tells the judge “I bet I do” go home as if she’s the boss, and then she just can’t shut up as the judge continues to hit her with 30-day contempt of court charges. It starts off at 30 and escalates all the way up to 300, which was a record for Bennett, thanks to a couple of hearty F-bombs at the end. She was just like that kid trying to be cool in elementary school while the teacher is threatening with detention. Only this was real life, and jail is much worse than detention.

Well done, Burks, well done. I guess if you’re going to go hard, might as well go all the way.

H/T Jose3030

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Tito Ortiz busted for DUI after partying at Playboy Mansion

Tito OrtizTito Ortiz was arrested for DUI after a night of partying at the Playboy Mansion, according to a report.

The MMA legend ran his 2012 Porsche Panamera into a concrete median on the 405 early Monday morning, TMZ reports. They say he was partying at the Playboy Mansion for a BCS football party before driving home intoxicated. He blew a .12 and had two passengers in his car.

Ortiz was released shortly after 8:00 am. His crash occurred around 4:00 am. Luckily it sounds like nobody was hurt.

Ortiz was one of the most notable UFC fighters in the organization’s history despite having numerous conflicts with Dana White. He has recently been associated with Bellator MMA and TNA wrestling. His ex-girlfriend, porn star Jenna Jameson, recently accused him of being a drug addict.