Morten Andersen Will Not Die

A few weeks ago, I lamented the loss of the single-bar helmet in the NFL when the Cardinals tragically cut punter Scott Player. Well, it appears as if my prayers have nearly been answered, and answered in the form of 47-year-old place kicker, Morten Andersen. For the second year in a row, the Atlanta Falcons have signed Morten Anderson mid-season to answer their kicking woes.

As if Morten didn’t already own every single kicking record in the books, now he’ll have 14 more games to put everything out of sight. Great. Good luck to anyone who wants to crack into the books these days. I don’t even know why the Falcons bother trying to find a new kicker. They already have Plan B locked and loaded every single year. Why not avoid the pain and just stick with him to begin with? Why blow two games where your kicker goes 1/4 on field goals rendering you the lowest scoring team in the NFL? And one thing’s for sure, as long as the kickers in the league are bad enough, there will always be room for Morten Anderson.