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#pounditFriday, March 29, 2024

Don’t Be Fooled by the ‘Opening Round’

From time-to-time in sports, and everyday life for that matter, you’ll see euphemisms pop up. You know, like the coach who’s decided to “Move on to pursue other opportunities,” when really, it should read: fired because he sucked. Well the same thing is going this evening, and I don’t want you to get confused. Tonight, the first game of the NCAA tournament will be televised. Beware: they’re going to tell you that it’s the opening round game — a title that should entice you to watch. Problem is, it’s not an opening round game. The opening round, as all of you heading to the green pastures of Las Vegas and calling in sick to work well know, is played on Thursday and Friday. Tonight as a matter of fact, is the play-in game.

It’s just a consolation game for two completely unqualified schools that in accordance to the rules are admitted for winning their conference tournaments. On the streets, the game is known as the right to get waxed by the #1 overall seed. In the media, they’ll try to convince you it’s the “opening round” game. Don’t be fooled; it’s just a ploy. 64 teams wasn’t good enough? No, oh no. Had to expand to 65 so we can ensure 16-20 Coppin St. has a shot at winning the national title. Meanwhile, Seth Greenberg is beside himself. (And don’t you fret, we won’t count the play-in game in the LBS March Madness pool).

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