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Thursday, April 19, 2018

Mike Parker Sacked by the LBS Nut Bag for Eating Napkins in Drunken Mess

We’ve all done some pretty stupid things when we were drunk, but eating napkins as if they were flapjacks probably is not on the list. Sadly, that’s what the voice of Oregon State, Mike Parker, did a few months ago at a Denny’s restaurant. Parker was in L.A. to call Oregon State’s series against UCLA and USC when he hit the bottle. Dude got so smashed he couldn’t distinguish between food on his plate and his actual napkin. This is not a joke.

You have to see this priceless video courtesy of Deadspin that has been floating around on YouTube since February 12th before Parker finally acknowledged it was him and apologized. Check out this beauty:

Parker says he’s had a sponsor for the past seven weeks and he’s trying to get past his problems. He also says Oregon State has been supportive of him. That’s nice and all, but when it comes to support I have to wonder about the people who took the video. When you see something this stupid it’s your duty as an American citizen to record it and put it on YouTube for our nation to celebrate with mockery. But when it comes to support, couldn’t they have been so kind as to offer the man syrup to help rinse down the napkins? I figure that’s the least they could have done.

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