Larry Brown Sports

That, folks, is Heisman Trophy winner Robert Griffin III in Subway sandwich form. According to the accompanying tweet that RG3 sent with the photo, that is the former Baylor quarterback’s head and shoulders sculpted out of smokehouse barbecue chicken. I personally don’t order hot subs from Subway and I certainly wouldn’t eat one that came off a star athlete sculpture, but RG3 must be flattered.

The good news is by tweeting a picture of something that has to do with himself, Griffin is safe. We wouldn’t want to see another embarrassing mix-up like the one we all got to witness over the weekend. Actually, yes we would.

Phillip Johnson, the manager of the 2011 Warner Robins American Little League team, led his youngsters on a memorable run in Williamsport at the Little League World Series in 2011. Unfortunately, he will not be able to do the same in 2012 because of a lapse in judgment. According to the Telegraph in Georgia, Johnson has been banned from the 2012 tournament for having alcohol at the Williamsport complex during the 2011 tournament.

Assuming he is being truthful, the toughest part about the situation is that Johnson never consumed nor opened any of the alcohol. In fact, he says a parent gave it to him as a gift and he threw it away.

“Little League found out, and obviously I made a bad decision,” Johnson said Tuesday. “I admitted it, and I regret it.”

Rules are rules, and alcohol is not allowed on the Williamsport grounds during the LLWS for obvious reasons. If the story is true, I can imagine the parent who gave Johnson the alcohol feels worse than anyone. He or she was trying to make a nice gesture and the results were unfortunate.

If it were me and I received a year-long suspension despite never having even taken a sip of the alcohol I was given, I’d be rummaging through the trash to get it back. Assuming it was something Johnson likes, he could at least save it and enjoy it from his couch at home during the 2012 LLWS.

Thanks to Prep Rally for passing the story along
Photo credit: Chris Gardner-US PRESSWIRE

For 13-year-old Kyle Smerer, what started as a run-of-the-mill in-game contest ended up being an joyful reunion with his Army sergeant father.

During the Mariners’ home opener Friday night, Kyle participated in the Steal-A-Base contest, where fans must run from center field, steal second base and run back within a limited amount of time. When Kyle procured the base, somebody dressed as an umpire held him up. It was his father, First Sgt. Steve Smerer, whom Kyle thought was still deployed in Afghanistan.

“Somebody grabbed me and I was like, ‘What are you doing? I’m trying to run back in a little amount of time,’” Kyle said, according to MLB.com.

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Alison Melder is a young, attractive lady who wears a bikini well, but she never won the Miss Bikini USA competition as she claimed. Melder became known last week when an investigation into Bobby Petrino’s phone records showed she exchanged several text messages with the fired Arkansas coach.

On a past modeling profile, Melder wrote “miss bikini usa 08″ and “miss motorcycle mania 08″ in the awards/credits section. She lied about the Miss Bikini USA 2008 part.

The Vice President and Chief Photographer for Miss Bikini USA emailed LBS to inform us that Melder did not win the competition. He also has no recollection of her even competing.

“I personally did the Arkansas event in August of ’08 and she WAS NOT there at all. ALL models that win MUST work with me and this girl did not. The winner from Arkansas in ’08 was a girl named Shirley and the over-all winner for Miss Bikini USA 2008 was Gia Allemand that went on to be on “The Bachelor,” he said in his email.

A quick look at the Bikini-USA website shows 16 women who received honors in connection with Miss Bikini USA 2008, none of whom are Alison Melder. They were so miffed with the false connection, they even wrote a long post on their website about the subject.

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The Tulane baseball team jumped out to a 5-0 lead Friday night over UAB but will have to wait a day to finish the game thanks to a power outage caused by fire ants overrunning one of the electrical units at Young Memorial Field in Birmingham. You read that correctly: Fire ants are officially the reason for a baseball game being suspended.

Both teams will resume the game Saturday afternoon with two outs in the top of the third. The day’s scheduled game will be played afterward. Presumably, copious amounts of Raid will be used by then.

Thanks to the intrepid work of CBS 42′s B.J. Millican, we have up-close video footage of the ants causing the damage:

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If you have yet to see one of the new State Farm “Fables of Fandom” commercials, now is a good time to start. In an era where it seems like a funny commercial is impossible to come by, State Farm’s NBA initiative hits the nail right on the head with short commercials that are witty and unique. Here is one of our favorites that centers around the Cleveland Cavaliers:

To watch more destruction and see how your NBA team loyalty stacks up, check out State Farm Nation® on Facebook today!

The way I see it, there are many types of fans in the world. There are fans who can afford to go to the ballpark or stadium but are content to sit at home on the couch and watch. There are also fans who would take out a second mortgage just to make sure they attend as many games as possible. And then, there are fans who are willing to quit their jobs just to go ballpark-to-ballpark for a full year. Meet Matt and Carolyn LaWell.

According to the Florida Times-Union, the LaWells recently began a 152-day, 26,000-mile tour that will bring them to 38 states to visit 120 minor league baseball parks. Planning for the trip began two years ago, when the couple cut costs by downsizing from an $850 per month, 1,200 square-foot apartment in Ohio to a $500 per month, 650 square-foot place. They also got rid of cable and rarely ate out. Carolyn says she did not buy any new clothes for 10 months. Basically they saved as much money as possible.

The first stop on the tour was last week in Jacksonville, and Matt said he and his wife weren’t thinking about what would happen if the trip turned out to be a failure and left them unemployed.

“You can’t have regrets,” he said. “That’s what it comes down to. A regret would be not even trying. We’re here. We’re in Jacksonville. Day zero. Tomorrow (Thursday) is game day, day one. If everything works out well …”

At the end of the journey in September, they hope to have spent around $10,000. If they do a good job of documenting the trip, the hope is that Matt and Carolyn can make some of the money back via the $3,000 website they purchased to showcase the trip. Matt is a former sports reporter, so he has the necessary experience.

Say what you will about the risk they’re taking, but you can’t fault the LaWells for chasing their dream. They may end up broke because of it, but at least they’ll have seen 120 parks in the process.

The 158th edition of the historic Oxford-Cambridge boat race was interrupted Saturday by a protester who jumped into the Thames River and swam in front of the boats, causing a restart in the race.

35-year-old anti-elitist Trenton Oldfield was arrested on a public order offense for temporarily stopping the race. Oldfield, who was nearly decapitated by the oars, claims his actions were of civil disobedience.

“I am swimming into the boats in the hope I can stop them from completing the race and proposing the return of surprise tactics,” he reportedly wrote on a blog post.

Oxford was leading the race prior to the restart, but Cambridge was came out victorious. Oxford lost a paddle when oars for the two teams collided, and that led to their loss, which they are appealing.

Oldfield’s protest wasn’t the only issue to occur during the race; Oxford crew member Alex Woods was rushed out of the boat to receive medical attention after collapsing at the end of the race.

Below is a video of Oldfield in police custody:

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While many halftime acts at NBA games feature some sort of acrobatics, artist David Garibaldi provides a nice alternative. Garibaldi paints portraits in a short amount of time, all while dancing and working with rhythm. On Saturday, he performed at halftime of the Knicks-Cavs game in New York and painted a portrait of Jeremy Lin in about five minutes. The entire performance was pretty sick and the painting will be auctioned to benefit The Garden of Dreams Foundation and the Jeremy Lin Foundation. Garibaldi is apparently a regular with this — he also performed at halftime of the Kings-Suns game Tuesday.

H/T The Hoop Doctors via I am a GM

Florida Atlantic University has one of the better baseball programs in the nation, but their facilities don’t reflect that. They currently sit a top the Sun Belt Conference, but every player has to sit atop the same throne when they need to take a dump. In an era where Division-I players in the most elite programs workout and practice in multimillion-dollar facilities, 30-plus FAU players have to share a single outhouse.

“It sucks,” senior second baseman Mike Albaladejo said according to University Press. “It smells sometimes. You could only imagine 35 people sharing one Porta-potty. The stench that comes out at the end of the weekend. The only rule that we have is nobody does the number two in there.”

So where do they do the number two? And how much asparagus are these dudes eating that a porta-potty where people only take a pee smells that badly? The stench is apparently real, and senior outfielder Alex Hudak is jealous that other schools don’t have to put up with it.

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