Nigeria-soccerNigeria pulled off an unexpected upset on Sunday when it beat Ivory Coast to advance to the semifinals of the Africa Cup of Nations. If the Super Eagles can find a way to win two more games, they will bring home the Africa Cup of Nations trophy for the third time in their nation’s history. They may also be treating the people of their country to lots of free action.

According to YNaija.com, the Association of Nigerian Prostitutes (we’re shocked that exists, too) was so excited over Nigeria’s win against Ivory Coast that they promised a week of free sex if the Nigerians go on to win the entire tournament.

“We want to congratulate the Nigerian national team, the Super Eagles, for qualifying for the next round of the competition,” a statement from ANP secretary Jessica Elvis said. “To show our support for the national team, we’ll be declaring one week [of] free sex if the Super Eagles can win the trophy.”

The odds may be stacked against Nigeria, but the African nation certainly has plenty to play for. Two years ago, Nigerian president Goodluck Jonathan banned the team from international competition as a result of its poor performance in the 2010 World Cup qualifying rounds. Now, the Super Eagles will set out to prove they are worthy of competing internationally. And if they can pull that off, free sex for everyone.

H/T Dirty Tackle

Danny Simpson bleedingNewcastle defender Danny Simpson was taken to the hospital after getting into two fights while waiting for food from a takeout spot over the weekend, The Sun reports.

According to The Sun, Simpson was partying at Circle Club in Manchester before leaving to grab some grub. Witnesses tell The Sun he appeared drunk and was a nuisance while waiting for food at Rice Flamebar and Grill in Manchester.

The Sun reports that that Simpson got into a fight with an older man, knocked him to the ground, and then tried to escape in a taxi. He apparently was dragged out of the car by two off-duty bouncers he supposedly was mouthing off to earlier, and they reportedly beat him up. He reportedly was left in the street bloodied and unconscious for about 15 minutes before being taken to the hospital in an ambulance.

Simpson, who is dating X-Factor judge Tulisa Contostavlos, seemed to be in fine spirits on Monday. He tweeted the following messages:

H/T Dirty Tackle

eden hazard charlie morganSwansea City ballboy Charlie Morgan became a sympathetic figure after he was kicked in the ribs by Chelsea’s Eden Hazard during a Capital Once Cup semifinal match on Wednesday, but a pre-match tweet suggests Morgan’s actions were deliberate.

Swansea and Chelsea were scoreless with about 10 minutes left when a ball went out of bounds. The clock continued to run as Hazard attempted to put the ball back in play. Chelsea lost the first leg to Swansea, so they needed at least two goals in the next 10 minutes in order to advance and couldn’t afford to waste any time.

Morgan, who has served as a Swansea ballboy for six years, smothered the ball and wouldn’t let Hazard get to it. Hazard attempted to pry it loose but he had no luck. He ended up kicking Morgan to get the ball loose, causing several Swansea players to go after him.

Many people were critical of Hazard for his actions and police reportedly are looking into the matter. Though Hazard went too far by kicking the 17-year-old, this tweet from Morgan puts the situation in a different context:

“The king of all ball boys is back making his final appearance” needed for time wasting. Hmm. It’s pretty obvious that Morgan was intentionally rolling over on the ball in a form of home cooking.

Morgan said he hadn’t been acting as a ballboy this season and was called in because one couldn’t make it because of the snow.

Hazard apologized for his actions while the 17-year-old Morgan said he would not be pressing charges.

To give you even more background on the matter, Morgan’s parents are part owners of Swansea and reported to be worth £42 million. Morgan uses his Twitter account to brag about his lavish lifestyle and show off his wealth. And as this video shows, the kid is a regular prankster:

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Neil-Lennon-CelticCeltic manager Neil Lennon was in the middle of his postgame press conference on Saturday after a 4-1 victory over Hearts when he was interrupted by a reporter’s cell phone. The sound of a phone vibrating or a text message coming in is easy to ignore, but this was a loud, obnoxious ring. Lennon couldn’t resist.

He answered the phone once, and the woman on the other line — who happened to be the reporter’s wife — must have been confused so she hung up. She then proceeded to call back again, and Lennon addressed her by name and told her to stop interrupting his press conference. She hung up yet again, likely more embarrassed the second time around.

Somebody’s going to be in trouble when they get home. I’d be willing to bet that reporter will have his phone on vibrate for all future press conferences. As Arkansas coach John L. Smith taught us during the college football season, nothing good can come of a coach using a cell phone during a Q&A session.

Video via Deadspin

lionel messi tuxedo

Lionel Messi won the Ballon d’Or award (FIFA Player of the Year) for a record fourth-straight year, but it’s his outfit that has people buzzing.

The Argentine wore a black tuxedo with white polka dots, white shirt, and a matching bowtie at the awards ceremony. Here’s another look at his tux:

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Kevin-Prince-Boateng-leaves-fieldAC Milan star Kevin Prince Boateng walked off the field on Thursday in the middle of a match against fourth-division side Pro Patria after allegedly becoming fed up with racist chants from fans. Boateng angrily picked the ball up, kicked it toward the stands, took his jersey off and walked off the field.

According to The Independent, players from both sides tried to calm Boateng down before eventually joining him and walking off the pitch. Many of the fans in attendance applauded as the game was canceled. After the game, Milan coach Massimiliano Allegri expressed his disappointment over the incident and apologized to the fans who acted responsibly.

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Larry Brown Sports spoke with soccer commentator Brandi Chastain last week as she was getting prepared for the NCAA women’s soccer Final Four. Chastain was speaking on behalf of the Capital One Cup, for whom she is an advisory board member. North Carolina, which was the only non-No. 1 seeded team to reach the Final Four, won the national championship and is leading the women’s cup standings.

We spoke with Chastain about her dust-up with Hope Solo, her thoughts on the new women’s national team coach, the team’s former coach, and international stars Abby Wambach and Alex Morgan.

Friction with Hope Solo

This was our first conversation with Chastain since she was on the receiving end of a postgame Twitter assault from Solo during the Olympics. Solo confirmed in her book that a pre-Olympics interview Chastain did with Larry Brown Sports bothered her. In that interview, Chastain called Solo’s positive drug test a distraction the national team did not need.

“I had one job to do at the Olympics for NBC, and that was to be an objective commentator and to use my experience to share with the viewer what was happening,” Chastain told LBS. “That is what I did. The outcome is unfortunate, but you control what you can control. I was happy with the job I did.”

Chastain says her bosses at NBC supported her.

“They felt that my commentary was fair, objective, and honest. That’s what they wanted me to do.”

When asked if she was surprised that Solo lashed out at her over Twitter following the game, Chastain said yes.

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