Not Even Eric Wedge Shaving His Mustache Can End the Mariners’ Losing Streak

The Seattle Mariners set a franchise record by losing its 15th straight game Sunday. They fell to the Red Sox 12-8 to make it four straight series in which they were swept (they’ve been outscored 86-40 during the streak). Manager Eric Wedge tried digging deep to end the slump, electing to shave his handle bar mustache after Saturday’s loss:

We’ve seen players go to crazy lengths to try and break slumps, so it’s not as if this is something new. We’ve seen them wear thongs, practice voodoo and even shave their entire body in attempts to turn things around, and most of the time it works. For Wedge sadly, it didn’t.

The Mariners manager explained his decision to chop off the ‘stache, saying “Drastic measures I guess. I just wanted to get the reaction out there that I’ve been getting from everybody and hopefully lighten them up a little bit.”

So much for that huh? At least the Mariners scored eight runs though. Baby steps Wedge, baby steps.

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  • http://twitter.com/AaronPerlut Aaron Perlut

    Today Eric
    Wedge violated the robust Mustached American spirit. Indeed, his actions
    have sullied the Mariners organization, culture, and any opportunities
    they may have once had to finish the season with a winning record.

    greatest concern is that Mr. Wedge did not hold true to his people —
    the Mustached American community — who look to our pop culture icons,
    athletes, celebrities, and dwarfs as symbols of what the sexually
    dynamic Mustached American lifestyle once represented.

    Mr. Wedge only read the biblical verses from the Dead Sea Scrolls,
    which is also referenced in Leviticus and the Book of Mormon, where it
    says, “each time a mustache is shaved, an angel in heaven dies and falls
    to earth.”

    Well, Mr. Wedge, today, several angels died and a nation weeps.
    You shame us all. Dr. Aaron PerlutChairmanAmerican Mustache InstituteAmericanMustacheInstitute.org877-STACHE-1