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Darwin Nominees, Donte Whitner

Who Owns $400,000 Worth of Jewelry?

September 21, 2009 by Larry Brown • Comments
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Donte WhitnerFirst off, let’s make this clear: nobody deserves to get robbed. Secondly, what kind of jerkoffs wait for a moment when they know a guy’s going to be gone playing in a game to rob him? How weak is that? Well I guess that’s exactly how they all do it, but anyway, it’s pretty hard to lose almost half a million dollars worth of jewelry if you never own $400,000 worth of jewelry in the first place. Maybe Bills DB Donte Whitner, who was robbed of that amount while he was away at his game Sunday, has learned his lesson the hard way.

You just have to hope the guys who robbed him aren’t fans considering Whitner had a pick six at the beginning of the game to help Buffalo build a big lead. I’m actually quite pleased about that because Buffalo’s big lead early forced Tampa to throw the rest of the game to try and come back. Since I have Kellen Winslow as my tight end in the Yardbarker Coors Light fantasy football league, all the throwing helped K2 rack up stats and it led me to a big win. The ironic aspect to this story is that there was an article floating around last week about NFL players having financial problems following retirement. Gee, when you’re wasting $400,000 on jewelry, it’s easy to see why. Hey Donte, ever try a savings account?

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