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Darwin Nominees, Guy Morris

Coach Praises His Team for ‘Crime’

March 3, 2010 by Larry Brown • Comments
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In yet another example of how the world has turned into a bizarro universe, Texas A&M Commerce football coach Guy Morriss actually had positive words for his players following their alleged theft of newspapers on campus. Part of the reason why he backed his guys is because he feels like the charges are bullcrap. The other?

Morris, who admitted to his team members’ involvement in the theft and said he supported their actions.

“I am proud of my players for doing that,” Morris said. “This was the best team building exercise we have ever done.”

Amen to that. The alleged crime is so petty that Morriss should stick up for his guys. The East Texan is a student newspaper that claims its first issue is free but every one afterward costs 25 cents. I have an easy solution: have the players pay back the five bucks or whatever it is that they owe and let Morriss go back to turning Commerce into a loser just like Baylor. If you’re wondering why they organized efforts to take all the papers, it’s probably because the headline was a story on two players being arrested as part of a drug bust.

Via Texas A&M student newspaper The Battalion which could use some editors to correct a constant misspelling of Morriss’ name. That’s two “S’s” in Morriss — the extra one reminds you how badly his teams suck.

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