By Larry Brown | June 10, 2007 - Posted in Football

Come on, now that’s a little weak. I mean even I could slay Jessica Alba if she were drunk and passed out naked in my bedroom, right? Of course, such a tribulation would result in me going to jail for a very long time without the privilege of conjugal visits. But I digress, Man vs. Beast, 85 vs. Restore the Roar, was a disappointment. Ocho Cinco got a massive head start in a race that didn’t even last one straight-away. I believe he got a 100 meter head start for a race that went 1/8th of a mile. Puh-lease. While the race may not have been fair for the horse, at least it was for a good cause — charity. And even better than that, Chad had his trash-talking shoes on like usual.

“Floyd Mayweather, you’re next,” he said. “I want to fight you. I’d like to take Kobe (Bryant) and LeBron (James) one-on-one. Jeff Gordon, we can take a couple laps.”

“Street Sense, Curlin,” he said. “Whichever one’s supposed to be the best horse.”

I love that guy. Good thing there’s only one Chad Johnson though, I’m not sure the world has room for many more. You should also check out the video of the race, it’s well worth your while. I can’t wait for Chad’s next stunt.

(photo credit The Enquirer/Jeff Swinger)

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