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Darwin Nominees, Everything Else

Manchester Soccer Player Will Make you look like Elephant Man

May 16, 2007 by Larry Brown • Comments
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I really have no idea what that means. It’s just enough of a challenge to get me to post on soccer, let alone figure out the freakin parlance of Britain. But here, because it’s kind of funny, Manchester City’s Joey Barton was arrested.

The 24-year-old England midfielder was arrested on suspicion of assault after being quizzed by officers at a Greater Manchester police station.

French international Dabo, 30, claims he was attacked during a practice session at City’s Carrington training ground on May 1.

He asked officers to investigate the incident, which he said left him looking like the `Elephant Man’ and needing hospital treatment.

Yeah, so about that whole Elephant Man treatment, I’m not so sure. Where I come from, serious punishment is making a man do the Elephant walk, so I have no idea what this Dabo guy is complaining about. Oh those cheeky Brits. And damn, whatever are they going to do not having Barton for their friendly against Albania? How will they win without him?

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